The Missing (on the) Links

From The Washington Post:

As his troops forsake their August recess this week to raise Cain over gas prices, their No. 1 campaign issue, House Minority Leader John A. Boehner (R-Ohio) has been home tending to his golf game and his fundraising.

Original DVD cover.

Every day this week, rank-and-file Republicans have staged “shadow session” protests on the House floor over the Democrats’ decision to adjourn Congress on Aug. 1 for a five-week recess without passing energy legislation. Officially, according to his office, Boehner is back in Ohio raising money for his political action committee, the Freedom Project.

But Boehner also found time to squeeze in a couple of rounds of golf. Boehner, a 7.6 handicap, reported to a U.S. Golf Association Web site that he shot an 85 at his home course, Wetherington Golf & Country Club in West Chester, Ohio. It is unclear based on the site exactly when the round was played. Boehner spokesman Michael Steel said he was confident that the congressman played “over the weekend” — and not during the energy protests on the House floor.

Boehner was also spotted Tuesday at the lovely Muirfield Village Golf Club in Dublin, Ohio [...].

When does Boohoo introduce legislation that will make Tuesday part of the weekend?

Boehner was there for an annual Freedom Project fundraiser and golf tournament. “Canceling it would have cost tens of thousands of dollars for Republican candidates across the country,” Steel told washingtonpost.com’s Ben Pershing, who first reported Boehner’s golf activities on the Capitol Briefing blog.

…snip…

He’s expected back in the Capitol tomorrow for what may be the final day of the House floor protests by the Republicans.

From All Headline News:

Boehner issued a memo along with Minority Whip Roy Blunt (R-MO) on Sunday asking his Republican colleagues to “make a stand” and join the floor protest until their request for an emergency session to hold a vote on offshore drilling is followed.

“It’s not a request we make lightly. But the American people are suffering… We must continue to make a stand until the Speaker complies,” Boehner wrote.

Nero fiddled, Boohoo tees up.

Boehner had asked Pelosi in a letter on Friday to call for a special session, saying, “You have the power to call Congress back into session at any moment to deal with issues of urgent national importance.”

Republicans want to end to the moratorium on exploration in the Outer Continental Shelf and Alaska’s Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. Democrats argue that oil companies should first drill on the 68 million acres of land already leased to them, and that excessive speculation in oil markets is the root cause of rising oil prices.

…snip…

Offshore drilling is banned by a legislative moratorium adopted in 1981 and an executive order issued by former President George H.W. Bush in 1990. The executive order was lifted early last month by President George W. Bush.

The highest Republican to attend the protest is House Republican Conference Chairman Adam Putnam (R-FL), who attended Wednesday’s talkathon. Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich was also present that day and said in a press conference, “There will come a vote in early September when there will be an up-or-down vote in the House… and at that point there will be a majority in the House in favor of drilling.”

Kids, Adam Putnam, you will remember, is that little putz who, heaven help us, will be replaced by our new friend and excellent candidate, Doug Tudor.

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17 Comments

Filed under Chimpy, Democrats, George H. W. Bush, George W. Bush, humor, John McCain, movies, Nancy Pelosi, Newt Gingrich, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

17 responses to “The Missing (on the) Links

  1. jeb

    Personally, I favor drilling. There’s lots of natural gas in Boner, Putznam and the rest of those energy industry flacks! We should tap that first.

  2. excellent idea, jeb!! i suggest we hire the dentist from marathon man to do the job. :wink:

  3. nightowl724

    I only have time tonight to drop by and say:

    nonnie and jeb, hahahahahahaha!

    nonnie, hahahahahahaha!

  4. Got a Grip

    Now, nonnie. To be fair, it’s not just the fabulous golf links (and all that good old republican/lobbyist networking that goes along with it) that’s keeping Boo Hoo away from the all important show of strategery the rethugs are participating in right now. His tan has really been fading lately so he’s got to put some time in getting that leathery glow. The tears show up so much better when he’s really tan, you know….

  5. nightowl,
    it’s not nice to laugh at people. especially jeb. he’s very sensitive.

  6. gotta,
    boohoo’s cap and bible are lined with reflective foil. plus, all of his clothes are tailored to include self-basters. he’s like a walking butterball turkey. those aren’t really tears, it’s vegetable oil.

  7. Got a Grip

    Boo Hoo’s actually a huge, untapped, walking alternative energy resource. From the corn oil in his hair, to the regularly scheduled waterworks displays and the hot air blasting from his mouth, he produces enough wasted energy to power an entire small state.

    If only we could harness all that power for good….

  8. and there’s all that navy bean soup that is on the menu of congress’s cafeteria every day. i think we have solved the energy crisis.
    next problem!

  9. jeb

    You’re right Nonnie. NO really upset me. I think I’ll call Boner and we’ll share a good cry.

  10. poor jeb! :cry: there, there, little fellah. i’m sure nightowl didn’t mean it!

  11. nightowl724

    Oh, no! I take the night off and what do nonnie and jeb do? They jump to conclusions! If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you jump. too?

    I was laughing with you, not at you! I love you guys and all the other raisins. You make me laugh – hysterically. Isn’t that what we’re supposed to be doing here?

    Now, you’re making ME cry and I never did get my shipment of tissues…

  12. nightowl724

    nonnie and gotta, your repartee made me LOL! And, that would be LOL’ing with you, not at, of course!

    Please pass me a tissue, gotta…

  13. nightowl,
    skip the tissues and get some oil of olay. you’re in danger of developing the most terrible laugh lines! :wink:

  14. Got a Grip

    nightowl, I’ve looked into the tissue issue and found that there is a terrible tissue shortage due to Boo Hoo’s overuse of the product. We may have to resort to the old-fashioned hankie for the foreseeable future.

    I wonder if Oil of Olay is what Boo Hoo uses to keep his leathery skin soft and supple? You have to keep that stuff soft, you know, if you’re going to mold it into a sad mask all the time. All those salty tears do take a toll….

  15. have no fear. the tissue crisis will be over soon. the government has awarded halliburton a no-bid contract so that they can employ underage children in some impoverished country, who will work 22 hours a day for a nickel making tissues.
    boohoo doesn’t use oil of olay. he uses saddle soap.

  16. nightowl724

    “Tissue shortage.” “Saddle soap.”

    The two of you are too much!

  17. well, you need all those tissues to mop up the saddle soap.

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