An Ego of Biblical Proportions

(ChattahBox)—Disgraced South Carolina Governor, Mark Sanford has spent the last two days furiously cherry-picking through his bible, looking for any religious justification for his sinful behavior of adultery, lying and abandoning his family and constituents to jet off to Argentina to be in the arms of his lover. And by golly, he found it!

Gov. Sanford told his staff during a televised cabinet meeting today that he was just like King David, the biblical King of Israel and that if King David didn’t resign after committing adultery and murder, well then neither will he!


Original movie poster.

As Gov. Sanford self righteously pumped up his chest, to lend further credence to the image of a man who would be king, in all seriousness, Sanford suggested that if the King of all Jews could survive his sex scandal, well then so would he.

…snip…

When asked if he would resign as governor Sanford said, “I have been doing a lot of soul searching on that front. What I find interesting is the story of David, and the way in which he fell mightily; he fell in very significant ways. But then picked up the pieces and built from there.”

King David is well known for his psalms seeking forgiveness for his sins and Gov. Sanford suggested he should be afforded the same forgiveness that God offered to King David.

From POLITICO:

South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford signaled Friday that he intends to serve out the remaining 18 months of his term.

“I remain committed to rebuilding the trust that has been committed to me over the next 18 months, and it is my hope that I am able to follow the example set by David in the Bible — who after his fall from grace humbly refocused on the work at hand,” Sanford said in a statement following a meeting with his Cabinet. “By doing so, I will ultimately better serve in every area of my life, and I am committed to doing so.”

Asked by POLITICO if the statement indicated that Sanford would not resign, his spokesman, Joel Sawyer, e-mailed: “Correct.”

…snip…

According to a InsiderAdvantage poll conducted just hours after the governor’s emotional press conference on Wednesday, 50 percent of South Carolina registered voters wanted Sanford to resign while another 42 percent thought he should remain in office. Eight percent of those polled had no opinion.

A Rasmussen Reports survey of South Carolinians released Friday showed that 46 percent believe he should resign while only 39 percent said the governor should stay.

…snip…

Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham said in a statement Friday that he supports the governor’s decision to stay in office.

…snip…

[Graham said,] “Second chances in life are not guaranteed or required. But if they are afforded, they can be a real blessing.”

A handful of current and former party officials have called on Sanford to resign, but one of the governor’s toughest critics, Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer, said Friday he would give Sanford “some space” to make his decision.

From the New York Daily News:

South Carolina’s first lady discovered Gov. Mark Sanford’s cheatin’ ways in January after finding a love letter in his files – yet as recently as this month he begged his wife to let him go visit his Argentine hottie.

“I said absolutely not. It’s one thing to forgive adultery; it’s another thing to condone it,” Jenny Sanford told The Associated Press during a 20-minute interview Friday.

…snip…

Jenny Sanford said she discovered her husband’s affair earlier this year after stumbling across a copy of a letter he wrote to his mistress in one of his files – not an unusual place for her to be, given her role as a top aide.

…snip…

[…] when the governor told her recently he needed time alone to write, she said fine – after specifically warning him not to visit his Latin paramour.

The first lady was shocked – as was the rest of South Carolina and the nation – to learn that he’d gone to Argentina, even after telling his staff that he was hiking the Appalachian Trail.

She said Friday she still doesn’t know if he has ended the affair.

23 Comments

Filed under Christianity, humor, Lindsey Graham, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Scandals, snark, South Carolina, Wordpress Political Blogs

23 responses to “An Ego of Biblical Proportions

  1. jeb

    I’ll bet old King David wouldn’t have asked his wife for permission to go bonk his lover.

    • can you even imagine more of a wuss? oh, please, jenny, puleeeeeeezzze can’t i go to argentina and screw my whore (i believe that’s the biblical term for a married woman who’s unfaithful)?

      • jeb

        The funny thing is she has all the money and it seems like the juice to make him crawl. I hope she keeps doing so and then tells him no. It’s not about forgiveness because he’s just looking to get back in. He doesn’t really mean it. Meanwhile, the voters of SC need to petition their reps and have him tossed out on his ear for abandoning his duties.

        • if he’s lucky, the mistress is married to a rich guy and will make out well in a divorce settlement. however, now that everyone knows she’s been screwing around, she might wind up with nothing. not sure how things work down there in argentina.

          in the meantime, he needs to be booted out, because he’s been a crappy governor.

  2. Sounds like he is still trying to get moved back into the house and not doing a very good job of it. I truly don’t think they are going to make it.

    I also read at the NY Times the identity of the leaker of the emails was another young man the mistress was fooling around with.. guess she needed someone to keep her warm while she was waiting…lol

    • i don’t think either one of them is serious about saving their marriage. i think it’s all for show.

      i read that the emails were leaked by the other woman’s ex-paramour and coworker, but i still think that jenny was the source of the leak. i think this whole thing is being orchestrated out of south carolina, not argentina.

  3. King David? I would have expected the Song of Solomon.

  4. ¡Qué arrogante bastardo! ¿Por qué estos chicos piensan que es de ellos para decidir? Ha ganado el derecho a recibir patadas a la orilla de la banqueta.

    Translation: What an arrogant bastard! Why do these guys think it is theirs to decide? He’s earned the right to get kicked to the curb.

    Ooops! I forgot he voted for English to be the official language, I’m just so confused if he is condemning others– As a congressman, Sanford voted in favor of three of four articles of impeachment against President Bill Clinton, citing the need for “moral legitimacy.”

    Hipócrita! Usted es una desgracia y no puede elegir si mantener su puesto de trabajo.
    Salir usted sórdido porcina!

    Translation: Hypocrite! You are a disgrace & don’t get to choose if you keep your job. Get out you sleazy swine!

    If he wants to get biblical, he might wind up getting stoned- and I don’t mean in a good way!

    • the hubris of these guys in unbelievable. i still can’t believe that lots of fundies who restrict their lives, because they’re afraid to step over the line and incur the wrath of the big guy upstairs, don’t sit and wonder why they have to be miserable while those they vote for are allowed to screw up and screw around and still get their support. don’t they ever get tired of the hypocrites they support, both in the political and religious world?

  5. IMO…it’s not about the infidelity to his wife and family, it’s about the infidelity to his constituents and being AWOL for several days. He shows very poor judgment on several levels.

    • it’s about a lot of things. it’s about the hypocrisy–he was screaming for bill clinton’s resignation. it’s about the arrogance. he thinks he can do whatever the hell he wants without answering to his wife, his state’s legislature, or the people of his state. it’s about the lack of judgment. mostly, though, it’s about his being a really crappy governor.

  6. I assume that you’ve noticed … the frequency with which these pols quote the Bible increases in direct proportion to how much they’ve screwed up.

    Maybe he should have checked out that “Do not commit adultery” bit earlier.

    By the way, I liked the “first lady” joke. That was funny.

    • i always say (well i really don’t always say it, but it sounds so much more dramatic when i preface my musings with that phrase), the higher the pedestal you put yourself on, the harder the fall.

      and thank you, wickle. apparently, you are the only one around here who appreciates humor! :wink:

      p.s. you have a baby coming on 7-8? that’s my son’s bday. your baby’s bday will be very cool 7-8-09! congrats! i hope all goes well. :)

  7. Mike Licht

    Just why did the Governor talk to AP on Tuesday, anyway? Simple: he’s paving the way for his next job.

    He told reporters that he counseled Ms. Chapur on her failing marriage.

    Look out Dr. Phil!

    See:

    http://notionscapital.wordpress.com/2009/06/30/mark-sanford-hes-back/

    • marriage counseling? love advice? i thought he was trying to get a gig on the travel channel. he can do a show on secret getaways to romantic destinations.

  8. Pingback: Witless Protection Program, Part 2 « HYSTERICAL RAISINS

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