In Part 1, we saw how the Princess Protection Program put Princess Sarah Palin in an undisclosed location along with her friend and political tutor,
Batshit Michele Bachmann. After a couple of years of fishing and conspiracy theorizing and studying the names of magazines and newspapers just in case Katie Couric asks Princess those tricky questions again, the dynamic duo of dodoheads is almost ready to reenter the public arena. All that’s left to do is a royal makeover.
With her RNC credit card in hand, Princess can visit her favorite shops for designer clothes and charge a mere $165,000 for hair and makeup. Next stop, the Republican National Convention to claim her title of heir to the throne. (Ooh! Princess Sarah can be Queen Esther while Sparky Marky Mark plays King David!)
With her new clothes, hairstyles, and enough patriotic jewelry strewn across her chest that she could make the most decorated military man envious and her tutor and intellectual soulmate at her side, who knows what her next stop might be…
It’s the stuff of which princesses’ dreams
and the rest of the world’s nightmares are made.