The Bad Rumor Man

Karl? Karl who? The White House is running away from Karl Rove as quickly as Rethuglicans are running away from Chimpy George W. Bush.
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From the Houston Chronicle:

Reducing Rove’s stature as he leaves could help the administration in the same way that Donald Rumsfeld’s departure as secretary of defense temporarily eased pressure on the president’s Iraq war policy.

White House aides deny they are engaging in spin.

Spokeswoman Dana Perino said she was just trying to humanize Rove when she told a Fox News interviewer about his creation of the Friday ice cream tradition.

Ice cream!!! Old Turdblossom can’t be all bad!

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Original DVD cover.

To the tune of The Candy Man written by (Leslie Bricusse and Anthony Newley)

(Ice Cream man)
(Hey, Ice Cream Man)
Alright everybody gather ’round,
The Ice Cream Man is here,
What kind of ice cream do you want?
Vanilla fudged?
Heckuva job brownie?
Chocolate chimp?
Anything you want,
You’ve come to the right man,
‘Cause he’s the Ice Cream Man.

Who can take opponents (who can take opponents),
Sprinkle them with poo (sprinkle them with poo),
Slander them with bullshit, and some innuendo, too?
The Ice Cream Man (the Ice Cream Man)
Oh, the Ice Cream Man can (the Ice Cream Man can)
The Ice Cream Man can,
‘Cause he’s hateful as can be,
Nothin’ ’bout him’s good,
(Nothin’ ’bout him’s good).

Who can take a bigot (who can take a bigot),
Feed that prejudice (feed that prejudice),
Break the voting system, leave it screwed without a kiss?
The Ice Cream Man (the Ice Cream Man),
The Ice Cream Man can (the Ice Cream Man can)
The Ice Cream Man can,
‘Cause he mixes it with fear,
And scares the people good,
(Scares the people good).

(The Ice Cream Man makes all he undertakes)
(Nasty, vile, and so pernicious),
Want a campaign that’s malicious?
He’s your man, cause he’ll be vicious!

Oh, who can take a nation (who can take a nation),
Treat it like it’s dirt (treat it like it’s dirt),
Piss on the Bill of Rights and out an agent who’s covert?
The Ice Cream Man (the Ice Cream Man),
Oh, the Ice Cream Man can (the Ice Cream Man can),
The Ice Cream Man can,
‘Cause he hangs around with thugs,
Who do the world no good.

(The Ice Cream Man can leave, but there’s no reprieve),
(From the political arena),
Spin just like a ballerina,
He will still get a subpoena!

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Who can be an asshole (who can be an asshole),
One we all resent (one we all resent),
Be despised by all, except for 29 percent,
The Ice Cream Man (the Ice Cream Man),
The Ice Cream Man can (the Ice Cream Man can)
The Ice Cream Man can,
‘Cause he doesn’t give a shit,
And he’s just no damned good,
(He’s just no damned good).

Yes, the Ice Cream Man can,
‘Cause he doesn’t give a shit,
And he’s just no damned good,
(He’s just no damned good).
An Ice Cream Man, an Ice Cream Man, an Ice Cream Man,
(He’s just no damned good).
An Ice Cream Man, an Ice Cream Man, an Ice Cream Man,
(He’s just no damned good).
An Ice Cream Man….

©nonnie9999

12 Comments

Filed under Chimpy, Dana Perino, George W. Bush, humor, Karl Rove, movies, music parody, parody, Plamegate, politics, Republicans, snark, White House scandals

12 responses to “The Bad Rumor Man

  1. Hi Nonnie!! 😛
    This is a great song and I will be singing it all day 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀

    Thanks!

  2. nonnie9999

    thanks mighty mikk0mouse 😀 !!
    i’ll be spending all day trying to get it out of my head!

  3. I think I love the skull ice cream. Can’t show it to my kid. She won’t shut up about Halloween and I know she’ll just want one.

  4. nonnie9999

    hey fabooj!!!
    so happy you visited again!
    the skull ice cream is really cool (no pun intended), isn’t it? funny how i would eat skull ice cream (or maybe even ice cream served in a skull if i was jonesing for ice cream badly enough), but i wouldn’t touch it if karl rove was within 100 feet of it.

  5. Friend of the court

    If Rove will be delivering ice cream in Texas, I hope his van doesn’t have AC. Rove committed Treason. We the People can’t just let the criminal against democracy walk away to the tune of Father Knows Best. Mister Rove must get a number and spend his remaining years behind bars. And so do his nutty buddies.

  6. nonnie9999

    amen, fotc. i think creamsicle or popsicle orange is turdblossom’s color!

  7. nightowl724

    nonnie, I hardly know where to begin my praise for this piece of work! That’s why it took me so damn *long* to begin it, I guess…

    Everything here from concept to execution is genius: the “Bad Humor Man, ” the “Ice Cream Man” movie, the perfect (long!) song, the graphics rendering, the relevant links, the level of snark…

    You know how much I enjoy song parodies, and this one – WOW! You always have wonderful, uncontrived rhyming and cadence, but his this one is a special joy! These lines particularly knocked my socks off:

    Who can take opponents (who can take opponents),
    Sprinkle them with poo (sprinkle them with poo),
    Slander them with bullshit, and some innuendo, too?

    Who can take a bigot (who can take a bigot),
    Feed that prejudice (feed that prejudice),
    Break the voting system, leave it screwed without a kiss?

    (The Ice Cream Man makes all he undertakes)
    (Nasty, vile, and so pernicious),
    Want a campaign that’s malicious?
    He’s your man, cause he’ll be vicious!

    (The Ice Cream Man can leave, but there’s no reprieve),
    (From the political arena),
    Spin just like a ballerina,
    He will still get a subpoena!

    One we all resent (one we all resent),
    Be despised by all, except for 29 percent,

    That’s parody at its very best, kiddo.

    For sheer humor, these lines rocked me:

    Vanilla fudged?
    Heckuva job brownie?
    Chocolate chimp?

    A nod for the changing refrains, too:

    ‘Cause he’s hateful as can be,
    Nothin’ ’bout him’s good,

    ‘Cause he mixes it with fear,
    And scares the people good,

    ‘Cause he doesn’t give a shit,
    And he’s just no damned good,

    nonnie, this whole thing floored me! Please post this at Daily Kos for more exposure – and send me an email as soon as you do. OK? OK! That’s settled now!

  8. nightowl724

    “And so do his nutty buddies.”

    Clever, fotc, very clever!

    And, the only van I want to see Rove riding in is of the prison variety…wearing either of the refreshing colors suggested by nonnie!

  9. nonnie9999

    i just posted a snippet of the song and a small version of the poster over in newsie’s sunday talk diary over at dk, so i guess i sorta took care of that already, ma’am! 😀 glad you enjoyed the song. i always sing other people’s parodies when i see them, so i always hope that people actually sing mine. sometimes they get a little tricky, because people sing them different ways. you might start on a different beat than the original to make your version fit, but how do you convey that without actually singing it? and nobody, but nobody wants to hear me sing!

  10. nightowl724

    Hmmm… OK, I guess that’ll have to do… But…

    Anyway, I rec’d your comment and added my own.

  11. nonnie9999

    thanks! 😀

  12. Pingback: Where Thinking Goes to Tank « HYSTERICAL RAISINS

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