WASHINGTON (MarketWatch) — Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, facing sharp criticism from fellow Republicans in the wake of his June arrest in an airport men’s room, will announce his resignation Saturday, according to news reports.
Original DVD cover.
Damn! If only Senator Larry Un-gay Craig had not needed to use the crapper that fateful day!
From the arrest transcript:
CRAIG: So I go into the bathroom here as I normally do, I’m a commuter too here.
CRAIG: I sit down, um, to go to the bathroom and ah, you said our feet bumped. I believe they did ah because I reached down and scooted over and um, the next think I knew, under the bathroom divider comes a card that says Police. Now, um, (sigh) that’s about as far as I can take it. I don’t know of anything else. Ah, your foot came toward mine, mine came towards yours, was that natural? I don’t know. Did we bump? Yes. I think we did. You said so. I don’t disagree with that.
I don’t know about you, but my feet are constantly bumping into those in other stalls. I do wear a size 28EEEEEE shoe, though:
OFFICER: Um, you you’re skipping some parts here, but what what about your hand?
CRAIG: What about it? I reached down, my foot like this. There was a piece of paper on the floor. I picked it up.
Wow! that must be some important piece of paper if he had to pick it up off a public restroom floor! I wonder what it was. Maybe he dropped his driver’s license, Social Security card, a hundred dollar bill…..
OFFICER: Okay, And then with the hand. Um, how many times did you put your hand under the stall?
CRAIG: I don’t recall. I remember reaching down once. There was a piece of toilet paper back behind me and picking it up.
Toilet paper!! All this just because of a 3″x3″ sheet of toilet paper!! It doesn’t matter that it was an invisible sheet of toilet paper that the officer could not see. It was still a sheet that brought down a sitting (literally) senator. A sheet so dastardly–a scandal sheet!!
Senator Craig, your fellow Rethuglicans have deemed you guilty. That you did something illegal doesn’t matter. After all, what Senator David Vitter did was illegal, but none of your fellow Rethugs (or you, for that matter) were wringing your hankies and demanding he resign. Your party, the Rethuglican party, is one of intolerance. You chose to align yourself with homophobic bigots who rally their faithful with promises of denying rights to American citizens based only on their sexual preference.
In closing, Senator Craig, if your pants are still down, I suggest you kiss your ass goodbye.