Tennessee Schmaltz

From Time:

The reviews are in, and the consensus is that Fred Thompson performed just well enough at Tuesday’s Republican debate in Dearborn, Mich., to keep his nascent presidential campaign alive and lurching forward.

Original DVD cover.
This, kids, is Chimpy’s true legacy! You now only have to be smarter than George W. Bush to run for the Rethuglican nomination. If you can manage to stay awake, keep your food down, and not drool, you can be preznit!! Countless doorknobs are expected to jump into the race at any moment.

“Considering it was his first debate, Fred did well,” says Scott Reed, a G.O.P. strategist who managed Bob Dole’s 1996 campaign but is unaligned this cycle. “He did what he what he needed to do.”

By that, Reed means that Thompson’s performance, though unsteady at times, was competent enough to allay some of the fears that have been building among Republicans over the past several months — fears that Thompson is too lazy, unfocused and ambivalent to do what it takes to run a successful presidential campaign. A series of gaffes and uninspired public appearances during his first weeks on the campaign trail reinforced the notion that Thompson was ill-prepared for a competitive run and probably insufficiently ambitious to turn things around. With pundits and influential conservatives ranging from Bob Novak and George Will to James Dobson heaping criticism on Thompson from every angle, it appeared that his campaign might be stillborn. All the while, his poll numbers — both in national surveys and early state samples — showed surprising strength. Now, after raising more than $9 million in his first quarter as a candidate (not awe-inspiring, but not bad) and surviving his first debate with GOP rivals, Thompson has bought himself a little more time, and a second look.


By all rights, then, he should have been the center of attention. But he wasn’t. In fact, after he struggled to field his first question about the economy, nervously searching for a word to complete an unexceptional sentence, Thompson seemed to fade into the background of the debate as Mitt Romney and Rudy Giuliani traded playground level insults over which one of them is the real tax-cutting deficit hawk. Thompson was well-tanned, but still looked older and less virile than he did as Arthur Branch on the Law & Order soundstage. His suit jacket was too large, leaving a gap between his neck and collar that conveyed an image of incipient frailty. His campaign is hoping he comes across as Reaganesque, but not in this way. Last night, at times, he did look a bit like Reagan did — in his first debate against Walter Mondale in 1984, when Reagan seemed out of touch and overmatched.

But Thompson got better as the debate wore on


Later, Thompson displayed some unexpected verbal agility when he countered Romney’s obviously rehearsed, but nevertheless clever, line about the debates resembling an episode of Law & Order, where, as Romney put it, “Fred Thompson shows up at the end.” “And to think,” Thompson replied, “I thought I’d be the best actor on the stage.”


So where does Thompson go from here? After a summer of tumult, his campaign seems to have a newly acquired sense of order and professionalism that it previously lacked.


“One of his challenges now will be to flesh out a couple of issues,” says Reed. “He needs a message for why he’s running. The aw-shucks thing has been great. His poll numbers are phenomenal. But people are shopping around. People moved to him quickly, but they didn’t know what they were buying. Now they want to know. They could move away just as quickly.”


Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, Chris Matthews, Fred Thompson, George W. Bush, George Will, humor, James Dobson, Maria Bartiromo, Mitt Romney, movies, MSNBC, parody, politics, Republicans, Robert Novak, Ronald Reagan, Rudy Giuliani, snark

39 responses to “Tennessee Schmaltz

  1. trm1

    Go Fred Go!!!

  2. Friend of the court

    We don’t need anymore actors playing President. Who is the base here? Where are the poll numbers comming from? Dang, that makes me wonder WTF are people thinking. Nice cover nonnie. I know I usually just go off on some tangent and, often, forget to tell you how much I appreciate your art work.

  3. nonnie9999

    hey, fotc!
    i don’t understand who the people making the decisions as to who will run are. i hope someone finds out soon and makes them stop drinking. omg! it just occurred to me–could those people be the same people who do the casting for law & order? that would explain the crappy partners mike logan has been getting on l&o: criminal intent for the last couple of seasons as well as that whole conviction spin-off.
    p.s. thank you for the kind words. it is nice to hear that what i enjoy doing might be appreciated my others.

  4. Friend of the court

    Speaking of Law and Order, Looks like Gonzo lawyered up. The guy called him, “Judge Gonzales”. Better than, “Bush’s Law Doggie”, I guess. I so hope that justice is served in this case.

  5. nonnie9999

    yayyy!! gonzogate is back!!
    i just googled. his new attorney is named george terwilliger. wasn’t that the name of one of tim conway’s characters on the carol burnett show? if not, it should have been. what will really be interesting is finding out who is paying for abu’s legal bills.

  6. Friend of the court

    I think you are correct about the name. It sure sounds familiar. This Terwilliger is a battle veteren of the 2000 war against the electorate. A member in good standing of Bush’s Army of Lawyers that was deployed to Florida.

  7. nonnie9999

    ain’t it amazing that every lawyer connected to the rethugs were in floriduhhhh in one capacity or another during the 2000 debacle? i guess that’s how they made their bones.

  8. Friend of the court

    I can’t remember the exact number that went but, it seems like it was in the hundreds. I wonder if any of them ever regret what they helped do to The Law.

  9. nonnie9999

    i don’t think they give a shit about the law. all they care about is money and power. do the chimp a favor, gets lots of power and make lots of money. screw the law.

  10. Friend of the court

    You’re right. They sort of give the term “criminal lawyer”, a new twist. I bet they all have flags on their lapels, though.

  11. nonnie9999

    😆 i am laughing because:
    a. what you said was funny, and…
    b. i originally had a huge flag pin on fred’s lapel, but decided to take it off and save it for a future poster. just looking for the right movie.

  12. Friend of the court

    Didn’t W. C. Fields do one called, “Never Give a Sucker an Even Break”? I think it was in a different one that Fields’ character gives his kid half of the last sandwich after he folds all the lunch meat onto the half he keeps, though. I may have to rent a few old movies this weekend.

  13. nonnie9999

    i don’t watch wc fields’ movies. if i want to see a nasty drunk who hates children, i can watch the news and see chimpy. 😀

  14. Friend of the court

    I never thought that Fields hated children. It seemed that he was a big kid. A big drunk kid. I don’t think that he could have written such great brats, if he didn’t have some kid insight. Chimpy, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to have any insight about anything.

  15. nonnie9999

    i don’t know about his personal life, but in the movies he was famous for telling kids that they bothered him. you have already touched upon the difference between wc and chimpy. you said that wc could write. chimpy is still trying to master crayons.

  16. Friend of the court

    The, go away kid you’re bothering me, line was part of a scene where the kid ends up getting the better of him. Most of the time, that’s the way that these encounters ended. Chimpy would, probably, end up getting bested by Baby Leroy, too. But, in Chimp’s case, it wouldn’t be an act.

  17. nonnie9999

    now we have come full circle. i went over to wiki to see what i might learn about w c fields, and i found this:
    Although lacking formal education, he was well read and a lifelong admirer of author Charles Dickens. He achieved one of his career ambitions by playing the character Mr. Micawber, in MGM’s David Copperfield in 1935. In 1936, Fields re-created his signature stage role in Poppy for Paramount Pictures.
    charles dickens! coincidence or should we cue the twilight zone music?

  18. Friend of the court

    Cue the music! Did we almost have a “flame war”? If so, I am certain that your candidate is unelectable, for some reason. And, may have accepted money from lobbiests, at some point!

  19. Got a Grip

    Now, now, girls. None of that flame war stuff here. Save it for the real enemy…..Congress!!! 😉

  20. Friend of the court

    Congress! those phony assholes. What planet do they come from, anyway? I have to admit that I have something in common with Abu Gonzales, I am in contempt of Congress, also.

  21. nonnie9999

    ooooh!!! flame war!!! do you think that will bring some traffic here? 😈

  22. Friend of the court

    It keeps me comming back. 😉 I don’t know the best way to get the word out. And, I can’t think of any names to call you, except, “Groucho Marxist”. When mikk0 comes back maybe, he could give us some troll buttons, then we could take turns up- rating each other out of hidden comments.

  23. nonnie9999

    ooooh!!! troll buttons! only problem is that we have only had one or two trolls here, and they don’t stick around. they get spanked, and then they disappear. i guess it is up to us to keep the vitriol going here.

  24. Friend of the court

    Bitch? Well, that does it. I shall be emailing the administration, anon. Oh, wait a minute, nevermind. You leave me no choice but, to go to one of the WATB blogs and write a diary about how authoritarian this place is. I shall return as a sock puppet.

  25. Got a Grip

    I bet if we go into freeperville and drop a link to one of your parodies there, you’ll have more trolls than you could shake a tazer at. And of course, you’d need on to shut them up. I shudder to think. Bad idea on my part, bad, bad.

    Flame away, my dears, I shall lay back and pretend as if I’m above such things, then swoop in to apply the proper admonishments. Or maybe I’ll just call everyone something really foul and tell everyone to fuck off. That should keep it going!!!!!

  26. nonnie9999

    boo hiss freeperville! i would rather nobody visit than for them to come over!
    and, fotc, email whomever you wish. a non is the administration for the near future, as the much more appealing mighty mikk0mouse is the one you should appeal to, and he is not here. i am all powerful! 👿
    bring on the sockpuppets!!

  27. Friend of the court

    SYFPH, Fluzzie. But, not the way you think. And, that goes for your posse, too.

  28. Friend of the court

    nonnie? Are you mad at me, now? It wasn’t me. It was the paint fumes talking.

  29. nonnie9999

    speaking of pie holes, you harridan, have you watched the new show, pushing up daisies? it is very cute and entertaining. the main character owns a pie shop called the pie hole.

  30. nonnie9999

    me? mad at you? that’ll never happen! i am part of a one-hour chat for 4 consecutive thursdays, and tonight, unlike last week, my microphone worked! the poor others had to listen to me babble on and on. so, anyway, i was called away for an hour, and that is why my answer was delayed.
    you paint-fume-infused sockpuppet.

  31. Friend of the court

    I haven’t seen any of the new shows, yet. What night is the daisy pushing one? I make a point of watching, “The Office”, which is on tonight. Other than that, I mostly just bother people on line or do some never ending busy work around the house and yard. Skank.

  32. nonnie9999

    the office is my favorite show!! i watch way too much tv. i record one show while watching another and clicking back and forth to a third during the commercials. daisies (on wednesdays) is about a guy who is able to bring the dead back to life. however, if he allows them to live for more than a minute, someone else nearby dies instead. the other caveat is that he cannot touch the person he touched before or s/he will die again. he has brought back to life his boyhood sweetheart, and now he can’t touch her or she will die again. of course, they are falling in love. in addition to the pie shop, he works with a private detective. they ask corpses who murdered them, and they collect the reward money. it is very quirky and funny. the other new show that i recommend is big bang. it’s on mondays, and i find it hilarious.

  33. Got a Grip

    Alright, you two hussies have really pissed me off now. Talking about new TV shows? Have you no shame? You are dead to me, dead to me, you hear? But not for the reasons you think!!!

    How did your thingie go, nonnie? Did you let give those deadbeats what-for? I certainly hope so.

    I’m still dealing with yesterday’s Cat-astrophe, which seems to have taken a worse toll on me than it did the cat. They revived her, and had me bring her home today. They thought she might be blind, but as it turns out, she can see well enough to accurately bite me on the ankle every time I go to leave the room. Both my ankles are bloody and swollen. I can’t wait for my sister to come home and deal with her again. I didn’t want her to die, not on my watch, but her being alive isn’t all that much of a thrill for me…. 😕

  34. Friend of the court

    My son used to have a hampster that would attack me every time I cleaned it’s cage. I didn’t kill it but, I didn’t mourn it, either.

  35. nonnie9999

    hey gotta, ye of the chewed up ankles. don’t feel too bad. last night, my son went with his coworkers to collect and tag alligators in the everglades. there were three boats. his friend joy was in one of the other boats. at around 2:30 a.m., i got a phone call. it was my son on a very crackly cellphone. i made out the words ‘injured’ and ‘hospital’. 😮 finally, the line cleared a bit, and he was able to tell me it wasn’t him whew!. it was joy. she got bitten and had to have a lot of stitches. when he finally got home hours later, he told me that she got hold of a little alligator. she didn’t have a good grip, and the 2 guys on the boat with her told her to let it go, as protocol calls for, but she didn’t. she held on, and it bit her on the face. she got stitches on the side of her face, her chin, and her lip. anyway, my point is that i am glad it is only your ankles in danger. put the damned cat in a cage, and stop wearing those fish-scented socks! hope your sister gets home soon.
    my pet adventure of the day. my son went out, so i had to feed the fishies. i opened the tank as per usual and proceeded to feed them. i sat down to crumble up a tablet for them, and i saw something out of the corner of my eye. one of the little shrimp jumped out of the tank and landed on the wooden part of the bed!! in a panic, i scooted it into my hand with my fingernail. it was bouncing around, so i knew it was alive, and i jumped up and threw it back into the tank. i had no idea those little boogers could jump so far!
    as for the thingie, it went rather well. i borrowed a microphone from my son, and he got it to work. i was not shy about letting my opinions be known. interestingly enough, i got applauded first by a guy who identifies himself as a conservative. he gave me high fives more than anyone else. it was interesting, and i am looking forward to next week.

  36. Got a Grip

    YEA, NONNIE!!! I’m glad you got to tell them what you think. That’s just fantastic!! I’m so proud of you, I’m just bursting with it. Great job!!!

    Now I’ll have to tell everyone I know that I’m friends with the newest and best star in the political arena. I feel a great swelling of pride as we speak (or it could be the blood poisoning…time will tell)….

  37. nonnie9999

    😆 maybe you need to talk to some of the other people who were in the chatroom before you throw rose petals at my feet.
    wait until after the 4th chat when i get an official NewsHour with Jim Lehrer tote bag!! i will even let you hold it for a minute! think of all the stories you will be able to tell then! 😀
    now let me find those antibiotics i have somewhere in the kitchen cabinet. it will probably take the post office about 3 or 4 days to deliver them. do you think your foot will still be attached by then?

  38. Got a Grip

    I’m supposed to go see the doctor tomorrow on an unrelated issue, but I’m sure he’ll have a few things to say about the bites. I doubt any of them will be in sympathy for the cat.

    I do so want to hold your totebag. It will my brush with greatness. I’ll be sure to hand it back before I genuflect at your feet, though. We don’t want to soil it…:-)

  39. nonnie9999

    this could be a good test of how good a doc he is. don’t tell him what they are, and see if he knows that they are cat bites.
    no genuflecting at my feet, gotta. i just found out from ann skank coulter that i am imperfect. 😦