At the movies with Chuckleberry!

The Los Angeles Times’s Entertainment News has a series of pictures and quotes entitled The big screen political wisdom of Chuck Norris, so I thought it would be fitting if Chuckleberry went to the movies!!

Original DVD cover.

Here’s a little bit of the article (it’s a very quick read and ironic in parts):

“It’s a new age of terror that requires a new breed of warrior…. The stakes are more than pride, more than honor, more than justice. Because they are fighting to save American lives.”

Is it a quote from a speech by George W. Bush? No, it’s the narration from the trailer for Chuck Norris’ 1986 anti-terrorist action-fest “The Delta Force.”

Pffftttt!!! Is it a quote from Chimpy? There are no grammatical errors. How the hell could it be from Chimpy?!

Many credit Norris’ endorsement with helping to boost Huckabee to victory.

Holy shit! We now select our presidents based on endorsements from a crappy actor who is one of the few people dumb enough to fill in for Sean Hannity! Here are a few tidbits from Wiki:

Now an outspoken Christian, Norris is the author of several Christian books, such as The Justice Riders. He has also been in a few TV commercials promoting Bible study and prayer in public schools, in addition to efforts to reduce drug use. In 2006, he began penning a column for the conservative news website WorldNetDaily. In his columns, he has expressed belief in Biblical creationism,[8] those who are troubled should turn to Jesus, and is quoted as saying “true patriots” do not stay clear of discussing religion and politics.[9]

Norris serves on the board of directors of the NCBCPS, an organization promoting the use of the Bible in public schools, and also speaks on behalf of organizations advocating offical prayers in public schools.


Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, Christianity, Fox News, George W. Bush, GWOT, humor, Jesus, Mike Huckabee, movies, parody, politics, religion, Republicans, Sean Hannity, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

29 responses to “At the movies with Chuckleberry!

  1. Friend of the court

    Hucklebee/Norris ’08
    Why not? If an actor can run for President, why not an actor for VP? I don’t think that giving kids Bibles in school will do them any harm, since NCLB, the poor things can’t read, anyway.

  2. nonnie9999

    ๐Ÿ˜† when you’re right, you’re right! the little bastards can’t read anyway!
    know what the new code word is now, fotc? vertical! scabby mchuckleberry just used it again in the debate. i wasn’t aware of it until i read this:
    apparently, the fundies don’t like being horizontal. personally, i like being horizontal, but i am a bit lazy.
    anyway, i think we need to start parsing every single word that comes out of scabby’s mouth. he is saying more that it sounds like on the surface.

  3. Friend of the court

    IIRC, vertical lines can go up or down or both ways, from a point. He does bear watching. Where will we find someone to translate fundi speek? Everyone, that I know and trust, has a brain that functions.

  4. nonnie9999

    i’m not sure, fotc. maybe gotta or nightowl can translate for us.

  5. Got a Grip

    I can translate, fotc. I was raised to be a fundie, so I can speak it fluently. I’ll have to catch the debate rerun when it comes on CSpan, as I’ve been tied up all evening and haven’t been listening. But I’ll tell you this, Chuckleberry scares the living shit out of me. Make no mistake about it, a fundie in a position of such power is a very dangerous thing.

    I will say, though, that I think having the Bible taught in school is an excellent idea. But along with it, they have to also teach the Quran, the teachings of Buddha, the Talmud, Hindu teachings, the beliefs of Indigenous Americans, all of them. This is not a Christian nation, we are a nation of many cultures and religions, and they should all be taught equally and fairly. And having read a great many, I can tell you that at the heart of each there’s not a dime’s worth of difference. It’s just that people pick out the nitpicky stuff to focus on and totally ignore the important stuff.

    Is our children learning? Not a fucking bit….

  6. Friend of the court

    Thanks Got a, I agree that there is a place for comparative religious studies in school. The thing that gets me nuts is when I hear someone tell a kid that the sky is blue because God made it blue. They will say that the kid is too young to understand a more “scientific”, answer but, if you give a kid a false answer like that, the kid might believe that their question has been answered and they will stop thinking about the question. If you give them enough false answers, they will stop asking questions. Our childrens is learning to stop asking questions. Yes, it is dangerous. I heard a teacher’s aide tell a kid that they should never say “no”, to an adult. This was the “sky blue”, lady. Top down authoriterrorism has no place in education.

  7. nonnie9999

    there is a place for teaching religion in school on a purely academic level, but i don’t know if i trust the majority of school systems to make sure that there is not a lot of proselytizing going on. therefore, i would rather they leave it for the parents to decide whether or not they want their kids educated in religion, and, if they do, they can send them for instruction after school or teach them themselves. when the kids are older and can decide for themselves and can resist the preaching of authority figures, then they can take classes to further their knowledge of other religions. in the meantime, there is plenty of learning to do in language, science, history, and geography.

  8. nightowl724

    “Artisan” to “Partisan.” Chucky’s expression. nonnie.

    Excuse me, but “political wisdom of Chuck Norris” is an oxymoron. Huckabee and Chuckabee love to quote the Bible. I’m a bit more worldly, so let me fling some super-silly-ousness, opprobrium, scurrility, vituperation, and obloquy in their direction, compliments of Shakespeare – a REAL writer and actor:

    [Thou] mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms! Thou villainous milk-livered minnows! Thou surly fen-sucked ratsbane! Thou warped unwash’d mumble-news! [Thou hath] not so much brain as ear wax. Thou artless bat-fowling pumpions! Thou droning base-court hugger-muggers! Thou mewling tickle-brained knaves! Thou vain pox-marked giglets!
    [Thou] rump-fed ronyons! Thou churlish fly-bitten popinjays! Thou yeasty toad-spotted pignuts! Thou weedy full-gorged moldwarps!

    Damn! That felt good!

  9. nonnie9999

    nightowl, the link didn’t work, but the sentiment was dead on! ๐Ÿ˜†

  10. nightowl724

    The “vertical” code word…

    Isn’t it Rush who’s always claiming that the lib’rals and the terr’ists use code words? The neo-cons and Evangelists have shown repeatedly that they “project” in the psychological sense of the word, and this is another example.

    I suppose you’ve all read about how No Child Left Behind was supposedly a coded phrase referring to the Left Behind books, suggesting that all children could thus be saved at the time of Rapture?

  11. nightowl724


    Try THIS one:

  12. nightowl724

    I can’t believe I had no takers on this bait yesterday:


    Fresno ’08!

  13. nonnie9999

    i used that website for a diary once.

    everything they say is in code, and it would behoove the dems to point it out every single time they use it. most people are unaware of the secret signals. i, for one, find it scary as shit that someone who wants to be president speaks in a way that only a small segment of the population understands. the piece of shit in the white house now does the same thing. his speeches are filled with evangelical bullshit.

  14. nightowl724

    738 comments!!!!! And, I was absent that day!!!!!

    I’m green with envy, even though you deserved it.

    I am just as afraid as you are when those assholes “speak in tongues.” The country has gone MAD from sea to shining sea.

    Still ignoring the Hysteria web site, eh? And, I thought I was being sooooo funny! As my mom used to say, “OK for you then.” BOOHOOHOO!

  15. nightowl724

    fotc, “…the poor things canโ€™t read, anyway.” LOL!

    nons, did you get the Raisin Country postcard?

  16. nonnie9999

    ๐Ÿ˜† that wasn’t all in one day. that was the diary that refused to die. i posted it on february 7th, and the last comment was on the 22nd. i think it might be some kind of record. it was pretty hilarious while it was going on.
    i went over the hysteria website the first time. just didn’t have anything to comment on. trm might have something to say. he worries a lot about electric vibrators for some reason.

  17. nonnie9999

    yes, i got the postcard. i was just going to write to you to thank you, but i guess i can do that here. thank you. i loved the picture!

  18. Got a Grip

    I understand what you’re saying about teaching religion, nons, and I certainly agree with you, especially in the current climate we find ourselves in. I guess I’m thinking of it more in the terms you’ve defined that as actually teaching religion. I’m more interested in them learning the history of religion that the actual dogma of the religions themselves. I am offended that children know so little about the world we live in that they don’t understand the basic principles that all religions share. But I have to say that the nutbags who constantly proclaim that this is a Christian nation and that the Bible should be taught in schools should be careful what they wish for. If you open that door, then things other than what you anticipate will walk through it.

    My great grandmother was a huge believer in the separation of church and state. She belonged to an organization (whose name has left me for the moment) that promoted that separation diligently, and she would spin in her grave if the day ever came to pass where religion of any sort were to be introduced into public schools. It is with her in mind that I say let’s just don’t go there, but if you force it down my throat, then we’re going all the way. Of course, you’ll have to study all the religions, and you’ll have to discuss how Christianity has made war and destroyed and demonized the cultural heritage of religions that are every bit as valid as that of the Bible-thumpers. And it will have to be pointed out that whatever they call themselves, if they can’t live by the principles espoused within your doctrine, then they are nothing more than bigots and hypocrites.

    In short, I think we’re in total agreement. As usual, I said it far less eloquently that you did, my dear.

    Christian nation my ass…..

  19. nightowl724

    Amazing… a two-week diary!

    Maybe I should pop over to D=S and post that link. On second thought, not.

    I’m glad you got the card. That’s the first time I ever sent anything from that site.

    ‘Night, all…

  20. Got a Grip

    Correction, that should be in “their” doctrine, not “your” doctrine. In other words, practice what you preach, or better yet, don’t preach, just practice. And let’s learn about the culture of others in a productive way and not demonize others we don’t understand.

    Okay, I’ll shut up now…..

  21. nonnie9999

    you know, if kids were just left the hell alone, they would learn about other people’s cultures and religions in the natural course of things. when adults get involved, that’s when everything gets skewed and political and all screwed up.

  22. Why do I always want to hum your name? Huckabee and Norris have opposing musical qualities … think about it. The sound of bare feet slapping the face of a bad guy to the rhythm of a bass guitar. This is, at least, more musical the sound of a chimp trying to mouth words heard through a microphone connected to Cheney’s lapel pin microphone.

  23. in2thefray

    I wouldn’t vote for Huckster in a one man race but…

    Holy shit! We now select our presidents based on endorsements from a crappy actor

    that’s neverhappened on the Dem side ?

  24. Personally I would love for the Huckster to get the GOP nomination. Can you just imagine the general debates between Huckabee and Obama or Edwards.

    Heck Richardson would look great next to Huckabee. Now that would be hilarious, the resume reciter and the Christian Huckster.

  25. nonnie9999

    hey bosskitty!!
    maybe scabby mchuckleberry can teach chuck to play guitar with his feet using karate kicks! that would be pretty exciting!

  26. nonnie9999

    of course, all kinds of celebs endorse candidates on both sides. however, it seems that everywhere scabby mchuckleberry is, chuck is there. have you seen the pictures? kinda creepy. and then there’s the fact that he’s chuck norris. chuck norris! the last thing he endorsed was the Total Gymยฎ .

  27. nonnie9999

    hey nyt!
    i can’t decide on who i want to get the rethug nod. i sort of miss rudy/rudoria being in the news much lately. grampa fred is always fun. plastic mittsie and his merry band of sons is fodder for comedy. john insane and ron moneybags paul, both good for a chuckle. and then there’s duncan hunter……….. ๐Ÿ˜† oh, who the hell am i trying to kid? duncan hunter!!

  28. in2thefray

    I just saw the commercial for the total gym. It’s like you’re psychic.

  29. nonnie9999

    i knew you were going to say that, in2thefray! ๐Ÿ˜›