And Get Off My Lawn!!!!

From The Boston Globe:

So Bob Dole, how do you really feel about Scott McClellan’s tell-all book about his days in the White House?

The former senator and presidential nominee fired off an email — first reported by The Politico — today to the former White House press secretary, who has been all over television promoting his book.

“There are miserable creatures like you in every administration who donโ€™t have the guts to speak up or quit if there are disagreements with the boss or colleagues. No, your type soaks up the benefits of power, revels in the limelight for years, then quits, and spurred on by greed, cashes in with a scathing critique.

Original DVD cover.

“When the money starts rolling in you should donate it to a worthy cause, something like, ‘Biting The Hand That Fed Me.’ ” Another thought is to weasel your way back into the White House if a Democrat is elected. That would provide a good set up for a second book deal in a few years.”

“I have no intention of reading your ‘exposรฉ’ because if all these awful things were happening, and perhaps some may have been, you should have spoken up publicly like a man, or quit your cushy, high profile job. That would have taken integrity and courage but then you would have had credibility and your complaints could have been aired objectively.”

“You’re a hot ticket now but don’t you, deep down, feel like a total ingrate?”

Yeah, Scotty-poo! Don’t be ragging on Chimpy! Go get an honorable job, like shilling for pharmaceutical companies so old men can get boners or lobbying for Dubai!


Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, George W. Bush, humor, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Scott McClellan, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

17 responses to “And Get Off My Lawn!!!!

  1. nightowl724

    I love little Scotty with the slingshot! Hahahahaha!

    And, yeah, like anyone should hope for the kind of legacy Dole has. After all those years in Congress, what do most people associate with him? Pr*cks!

    Wait, that makes sense in a twisted kind of way…

  2. nightowl724

    PS How was the party, nonnie?

  3. the party was fun and absolutely exhausting. i only got 3 hours sleep this morning, so i am going to lie down and then come back to read and answer any comments. i won’t make any sense otherwise.

  4. Got a Grip

    nightowl! You’re not d1cking around tonight, are you? I think you’ve nailed it. You’ve hit it right on the head. You’ve got Dole coming and going. What with the ups and downs and ins and outs of politics these days, you can never be too careful lest the pr1cks get one over on us. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    I think Dole is looking for a spot in Captain Underpants’ campaign. They should put him in charge of the “get out the youth” vote. Captain Underpants should start stockpiling Viagra right now. Oh, wait, I bet he’s already got a big supply on hand already. If not, I’m sure that Cindy Lou has a charity somewhere that can help them both out….

  5. Got a Grip

    Get some rest, nons. We’ll play nicely while you do….

  6. thanks gotta,
    i had a nice little nap and am slightly (but not by much) more coherent than i was.
    i don’t think that old bob is looking for a spot in capt u’s campaign. if i had to guess, i would say that he probably doesn’t care much for capt u. i think old bob still wants to be relevant, and he is trying to bring some attention to his wife, who doesn’t seem to be doing very well in the polls. it seems that north carolina is becoming a little bit bluer than it has been in the recent past! ๐Ÿ˜€ oh, how i would love to see old libby losing that senate seat!

  7. Got a Grip

    I think Bob is probably too old to give a sh1t about much of anything anymore. Maybe he and Captain Underpants can star in “Grumpy Old Men” after the election. It’ll give them both something to do other than screw up other people’s lives.

    Not only is NC becoming a little bluer, but the grass in Kansas where Dole haled from is starting to grow some significant blue roots these days, too. Blue is the new black this year, red is definitely so last year. It’s all the rage, especially in the younger crowd.

    Nothing would give me more pleasure than see old Libby forced into retirement. She and Bob could spend some quality time trying out those little blue pills without anyone having to worry they might procreate….. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  8. gotta,
    i think bob popped a viagra, all the blood rushed from his brain to his shriveled little wee-wee, and he was unable to think when he typed up that little email.
    you know what really gets me about these people are that they only care about the idiots being faithful to chimpy. what the hell ever happened to being faithful to the citizens they are supposed to be working for?
    as for libby dole, when you first and last name represent 2 different canned goods companies, you are bound to be a little fruity. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  9. nightowl724

    Whether Dole wants to help McCain or not, he does do two good things for him. 1) He makes CU look like a spring chicken. 2) He makes CU look smart.

    gotta – “get out the youth vote.” nonnie – “fruity.”


  10. nightowl,
    even if dole makes capt u look like a spring chicken, it is like telling a young woman she should go out with a man she doesn’t like, because grandma says he’s nice. it is rarely a successful argument, unless grandma is very, very rich and will write granddaughter out of her will if she doesn’t date the guy. capt u is just not very attractive to anyone, and there are not enough rich grandmas with lawyers on speed-dial to make younger people vote for him.

  11. jlms qkw - jenn

    the bigger picture is great! slingshot david/scotty v. ?goliath bob dole? bob dole is so 20th century.

    great tie tack.


  12. jlms qkw - jenn

    oh, i was please to see that dole could email. maybe he could use it – does he have grandchildren from his first marriage?

  13. jenn,
    sometimes i wonder if these so-called elder statesmen really send out these messages on their own or if they are written by party strategists and sent out under their names with their consent. i find it very strange that dole would use such strong language. not saying that he didn’t approve, just that i find it odd for him to react so strongly, especially when scotty-poo didn’t say anything that a lot of others haven’t said already.

  14. jlms qkw - jenn

    there is no end to the machinations of turd blossom.

  15. ‘zactly, jenn!!! i think the rethugs think that the only thing they have left is turdblossom. howevah, i think that turdie’s methods have been exposed, and that makes it easier to fight against them. turdie’s time has come and gone. i hope we never have to see him until he is frog-marched off to jail.

  16. And Nonnie gets her wish. Maybe next time Liz’beth will refrain from calling her opponent a devil worshiper when the woman actually teaches a Sunday school class.