Let Them Eat Cake (and don’t let them get crumbs on this $3860 dress!)

From National Nine News:

First it was the number of houses US presidential candidates owned that measured their ability to connect with the battlers of America, now it’s the value of the frocks their wives are wearing.

Republican nominee John McCain’s wife Cindy has set tongues wagging by turning up to the party’s national convention wearing an outfit estimated to be worth more than $360,000.


Original DVD cover

In an analysis of the would-be first lady’s ensemble, Vanity Fair magazine reports the Oscar de la Renta dress Mrs McCain wore cost $3860, her Chanel watch $5500 and shoes $740.

But the real bling was hanging from her ears, with three-carot diamonds worth about $344,000.

The magazine also scrutinised the current First Lady Laura Bush’s designer outfit.

The value of Mrs Bush’s clothes and jewellery came in at a comparatively modest $5000, including her $3000 white Oscar de la Renta suit.

From Vanity Fair:

One of the persistent memes in the Republican line of attack against Barack Obama is the notion that he is an elitist, whereas the G.O.P. represent real working Americans like Levi “F-in’ Redneck” Johnston.

It caught our attention, then, when First Lady Laura Bush and would-be First Lady Cindy McCain took the stage Tuesday night wearing some rather fancy designer clothes. So we asked our fashion department to price out their outfits.

Laura Bush

Oscar de la Renta suit: $2,500
Stuart Weitzman heels: $325
Pearl stud earrings: $600–$1,500
Total: Between $3,425 and $4,325

Cindy McCain
Oscar de la Renta dress: $3,000
Chanel J12 White Ceramic Watch: $4,500
Three-carat diamond earrings: $280,000
Four-strand pearl necklace: $11,000–$25,000
Shoes, designer unknown: $600
Total: Between $299,100 and $313,100

Wow! No wonder McCain has so many houses: his wife has the price of a Scottsdale split-level hanging from her ears.

That doesn’t even include the costs for the makeup artists, the hairdressers, the pharamacists, and the guy who follows Cindy Lou around with a syringe filled with Botox!

By the way, not that anyone asked, but I thought the dress looked like the ones my mother’s friends used to wear to bar mitzvahs back in the 60’s. And, Cindy Lou, don’t wear yellow. Just don’t.

26 Comments

Filed under 2008 election, Barack Obama, humor, John McCain, Laura Bush, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, snark

26 responses to “Let Them Eat Cake (and don’t let them get crumbs on this $3860 dress!)

  1. nightowl724

    Isn’t that just sickening? That’s more money than most Americans earn in ten years – and, she’ll probably never even wear it again! I mean, how could she? It’s so, so… yellow! BTW, I read that orange is actually her fave color and I saw photos of the four bright orange dresses she wore during the convention.

    But, that’s OK. I’m sure she justified buying a new outfit with her tax cut more or less the same way I justified paying last winter’s heating bill with my “stimulus” check:

    Bush’s Tax Cuts Pay For Cindy’s Outfit
    http://tinyurl.com/5so6q5

    Anyway, that thing that you do, nonnie, with that PhotoShop thing – you’re getting pretty good at it! Ha-ha! Nice work, kiddo!

  2. jeb

    Nonnie, why do you hate America? Why do you think that extremely wealthy people can’t represent the working class men and women of this country? Just look at our current Prez. He’s a wonderful and regular guy. Started his own businesses, got to where he is on his determination and acumen. Johnny Mc served his country and worked his way up the hard way and (what? oh right, excuse me while I let Tinkerbell and Peter in for a minute…) Now where was I?

    As I read your inventory I thought you wouldn’t account for the Botox. I’ll never doubt you again.

  3. nightowl,
    if they scanned the audience, i would bet that most of the morons who screamed in evangelistic orgasmic delight were wearing what they bought on sale at kmart. imbeciles!
    by the way, can you tell that i had to smoosh 2 different pics of cindy lou together? i couldn’t find a good pic of the dress, so i had to use a small one and enlarge it and stick a separate pic of her face and collar on it.

  4. jeb,
    i am glad that you learned your lesson! how could i possibly forget the botox? it’s who cindy lou is!
    i am watching the daily show (special friday edition), and they played parts of capt u’s speech together with chimpy’s speech when he was running. same $hit, different mouth. it was hilarious!

  5. jeb

    Nonnie, a friend of mine emailed me about that. He said he would on watch The Daily Show for coverage because they were the only ones who get it right.

  6. i have 2 days of tds and the colbert report recorded, but i haven’t watched them yet. tonight’s tds was brilliant and hilarious. colbert just started.

  7. jlms qkw - jenn

    i’m going to watch the second show of tds/tcs.

    love the foreign currency, nonnie.

    cindy lou looks like she had a fashion consultant working for her this week. i miss the acid green dress already.

  8. jenn,
    i didn’t even notice the foreign currency. 😳 that was on the original dvd cover.
    if cindy lou has a fashion consultant, i suggest she get a new one. she looks plastic, and her outfits only cement that image. she looks like she is stuck in another era a lot of the time.

  9. nightowl724

    nonnie – no way did I notice all the splicing and dicing you did to Cindy Lou. Fantastic job!

  10. Got a Grip

    I totally agree with you on the color of that dress, nons (not that I disagree with you on anything else). That is a horrible color, very few people ever even attempt that color. It’s certainly not a color that someone with over-bleached hair and skin that’s been roasted to a crackly crunch should attempt.

    I briefly considered calling the St. Paul paramedics to come rush her to the hospital for that case of jaundice from which she appeared to be suffering before realizing it was wholly a function of poor taste and bad lighting. It’s just as well that I didn’t have to do it, since the paramedics were all busy either treating protesters who were victims of Minnesota’s finest or trying to bail themselves out of jail after being swept up in the great 1st Amendment Smackdown of 2008. I feel safer. Don’t you?

  11. gotta,
    i thought the dress was ridiculous. what’s with the collar? was it windy in the convention hall? was the collar to protect cindy lou’s hair? i think oscar de la renta watched a jetsons marathon and then designed that dress.
    i don’t know what it is with cindy’s fashion sense. she seems to overdo everything. there are some things she wears that would be fine, but then she curls her hair and puts on 6 pounds of jewelry and ruins it.
    when cindy lou gave her speech, i didn’t watch it. i just listened. she’s a horrible speaker. today, i saw snippets of her speech on the news, and it was worse than just listening. the half-closed eyes thing that was supposed to look like sincerity, the tilted head that looked like what dogs do when they did something wrong and desperately want to look cute. it was like watching a really horrible actress.
    i especially loved the part of the speech where she called capt u a magnificent father or something like that. i read an article from a few years ago where cindy lou said that she raised the kids with the help of her parents who lived across the street, because her husband was never home. it was a direct quote from her, not the reporter’s interpretation. i tried to find the article, but i couldn’t. i think it was good housekeeping or one of those mags. hey!! i just found it!! it was harpers bazaar. here it is! that article and this one from the new republic were very interesting.

  12. Got a Grip

    Thanks for the articles, nons. I plowed right through the Harper’s article, but I’m having to pause mid-article on the Free Republic one. I inadvertently made the mistake of glancing down at the comment section and the rethug yuckiness leaped into my eyes and temporarily blinded me.

    You’re right, she never looks well put together. It all looks exceedingly expensive but somehow inappropriate. Money can’t buy you taste, I suppose. But this dress was one of the worst. It looked like it was too big for her, it didn’t fit her well at all. I kept thinking, why didn’t she have that thing tailored? And it looked heavy, as though the effort it took to move was exhausting. It’s just a horrible garment.

    I also don’t understand the diamond earring thing. It’s just a personal thing with me, but I think diamonds are a huge waste of good money (not to mention the conditions under which they are acquired).

    Laura, on the other hand, looked quite attractive in her white suit. Laura seems to over-compensate for being married to a tasteless pig by dressing with matronly elegance, sort of a “look how tasteful I am, I can’t possibly be with this idiot” kind of thing.

  13. nightowl724

    To me, Cindy Lou looked as if she was wearing the drapes from the movie theater I went to as a child. I’m no fashion bug myself, but I thought shirtwaist dresses went out in the 60s. And, the color was more crass than class. I have seen her turn up her collar in other outfits. James Dean she ain’t! Or even Fonzie, for that matter…

  14. Got a Grip

    It was very 60’s-movie-theater-draperies like material. That kind of old gold lam’e (sorry, I can’t ever remember how to make the little thingie over the “e” in lam’e) is very old fashioned and just doesn’t work in an old style like that. It was the kind of tacky that only rich can experience.

    Shirt dresses have made a comeback, as all fashions do, but it’s been updated. This dress was not one of those. It was just awful.

    My mom used to wear shirtwaist dresses when I was little, and I always thought they were lovely. My mom was kind of a babe, and she always looked hot in a shirtwaist dress. When they went out of fashion, I raided her closet and would put them on and cinch the waist with baler’s twine, then go mount my horse and ride about the farm pretending to be a brave frontier woman (my cousin once called me Andy Oakley. I promptly kicked his citified ass.)

    Anyway, I’m just babbling now. I owe you an email or two, nightowl. I haven’t forgotten, I’ve just had my hands full of family stuff. I’ll give you a shout when I’ve got a minute, I promise. 😉

  15. gotta,
    the dress’s material was so heavy and stiff that it gave the appearance that it was moving cindy lou instead of her actually moving of her own free will. a woman is supposed to wear the clothes, not the other way around.
    i don’t like pickles bush in the least bit, but i have to admit that she looked good this time ’round. don’t make me go back to that inaugural gown that she purchased from kmart though! 😉

  16. bingo, nightowl!
    the dress looked like it was made from upholstery material! in fact, it reminds me of a couch we had up in new yawk. it was green, but it was antique satin and had that sheen to it. the green would have been better than puke gold though.
    i’m with gotta on the shirtwaists. i don’t think they ever did or ever should go out of fashion. they are usually quite tasteful. however, this one was just plain ugly. too bulky, no flow, and completely unflattering. hell, i dress like crap 99.9999% of the time, but i don’t spend over $300k to do so!
    i think cindy lou fancies herself as the new grace kelly. think again, cindy lou! a turned-up collar does not a classic beauty make. 🙄

  17. Got a Grip

    Well, since that little charmer from Alaska is being called “Caribou Barbie”, and since I think Cindy Lou looks a lot like the Barbie doll I hated as a child (stiff arms and legs, dingy white plastic hair, a plastic tan that looked like she’d been rubbed with mud), I’m sensing a theme amongst the rethug women this year. What kind of theme Barbie is Cindy Lou? Desert Barbie? Stepford Barbie? Left-too-long-in-the-sun-until-my-face-melted-and-the-plastic-scorched Barbie? Help me out here.

    And let’s not forget those other delightful rethug women. What kind of Barbie would Laura be, or Kay Bailey Hutchison? What about Ann Coulter and the venom spitting Michelle Malkin, or Dr. Laura?

    This could be a fun game, Raisinettes!

  18. botox barbie!!! what else could cindy lou be? i have to think about the others for a while.

  19. Got a Grip

    Botox Barbie is good! I like that one. Although I did have Percocet Barbie pop into my head while making supper.

    I’ll have to think on the others, too. So many Barbies, so little time….

  20. i think pickles is stepford barbie (though i believe betty broderick barbie is right below the surface).

  21. Got a Grip

    Betty Broderick Barbie! I’d totally forgotten about Betty Broderick, but I think you’re right, I think that’s just simmering under the surface of Pickles’ frozen smile.

    I’m still working on the others. I got hung up on Malkin. Rabid Barbie is what is stuck in my head and I just can’t seem to get past it….

  22. gotta,
    once chimpy is no longer surrounded 24/7 by secret service agents, i think he will be found lifeless, with half a bag of pretzels mysteriously crammed into his throat. pickles will be standing by his side with tears in her eyes, but with suspiciously salty fingers.

  23. nightowl724

    I was off ordering a new computer online (YAY!) and I was missing all the fun over here! Caribou Barbie! Botox Barbie! Betty Broderick Barbie! Stepford Barbie? Left-too-long-in-the-sun-until-my-face-melted-and-the-plastic-scorched Barbie?

    Hahahahahahaha!

    Jeb, Jenn, gotta, nonnie – you guys just are soooo funny! This is the bestest place to hang out…

    gotta, I’d love to hear from you when you get a chance!

    I’m thinking Condi is Shoe Fetish Barbie (Imelda Barbie’s cousin who comes complete with 1,000 pairs of footwear), Coulter is Grim Reaper Barbie (by day and Grim Reaper Barney by night), and Malkin is Big Mouth Barbie (I’d love to see her as Pinocchio Barbie except it would take more than one of those little stands to hold her up once her nose grew bigger than her “you-know-what’s”) .

  24. this is just too much fun! this might have to be continued in another diary in the near future. 😉

  25. nightowl724

    I’m game!

  26. Got a Grip

    Me too! 🙂

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