Yearly Archives: 2008

The War on the Ground(hog)

PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) – America’s most famous groundhog emerged from his burrow early on Saturday and declared that winter will last another six weeks.

Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow shortly before 7:30 a.m. to the cheers of more than 30,000 people from as far away as Alaska and Texas, one of the largest crowds in the 122-year history of the event in the central Pennsylvania town of Punxsutawney.


Original DVD cover.
But wait! Trouble lurks!
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Filed under Chimpy, Congress, Dick Cheney, George W. Bush, Georgia, Harry Reid, humor, movies, Nancy Pelosi, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Ron-ing on Empty

Hey, kids, did you watch the Republican debate the other night? Was it really a debate, or was it a seance? In an hour and a half, Ronald Reagan’s name was mentioned 54 times! Chimpy? Not so much. Well, I thought I would write a song to commemorate the event. Sing along, kids!

To the tune of Da Do Ron Ron, perfomed by The Crystals (written by Ellie Greenwich & Jeff Barry):
**********
No matter what you ask,
Our answers are the same,
We’ll say Ron, Ron, Ron, we’ll say Ron, Ron!
No matter what the subject,
We’ll invoke his name,
We’ll say Ron, Ron, Ron, we’ll say Ron, Ron!


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Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, CNN, Dick Cheney, humor, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, movies, music parody, parody, politics, Republicans, Ron Paul, Ronald Reagan, Rush Limbaugh, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

How should I know if something’s illegal? I’m just the Attorney General!

From The New York Times:

WASHINGTON — Attorney General Michael B. Mukasey said Wednesday that while he would consider it torture if he underwent the harsh Central Intelligence Agency interrogation technique known as waterboarding, the practice was not necessarily illegal, and he would not rule out its use in the future.

…snip…

“Would waterboarding be torture if it were done to you?” asked Senator Edward M. Kennedy, Democrat of Massachusetts, glowering at Mr. Mukasey.

“I would feel that it was,” Mr. Mukasey acknowledged in the low monotone that he uses in virtually all public settings.

But the attorney general, a retired federal judge, would not be drawn into a larger conversation with Senator Kennedy or other Democrats over whether waterboarding might amount to torture if it was carried out on others, including American citizens held abroad.


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Filed under 9/11, al-Qaeda, Charles Schumer, CIA, Congress, Democrats, Edward Kennedy, humor, Michael Mukasey, movies, parody, Patrick Leahy, politics, Russ Feingold, Senate Judiciary Committee, September 11, Sheldon Whitehouse, snark, Torture, waterboarding, Wordpress Political Blogs

Bananas

From The New York Times:

Bush, Facing Troubles, Focuses on War and Taxes

And we know how difficult it is for the little fella to focus!
curiousgeorge
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Filed under Books, Chimpy, Congress, Democrats, FISA, Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act, George W. Bush, Harry Reid, humor, Iraq War, Laura Bush, movies, Nancy Pelosi, NCLB, No Child Left Behind, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wiretaps, Wordpress Political Blogs

Diebold, But Not Da Beautiful

Yeah, I know you were probably expecting something about the State of the Union speech, but, c’mon, what is there to say? The state of the union sucks, and Chimpy’s an asshole. There. Done. And to think the idiot talking heads on tv took hours and hours and hours to say that very same thing.
As a resident of Floriduhhhhh, I am quite relieved that the vote was today, as now we won’t be bombarded with campaign ads for a while. In other words, today marks the end of….
terrorinthetropics
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Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, Cubans, Environment, Florida, George W. Bush, humor, Immigration, Iraq War, John McCain, Mike Huckabee, Mitt Romney, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Ron Paul, Rudy Giuliani, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Far Out Foreign Policy

From the transcripts of the Republican presidential debate in Boca Raton, Floriduhhhh (from the Federal News Service via The New York Times):

MR. [Tim] RUSSERT: Governor Huckabee, was the war a good idea, and is it worth the cost in blood and treasure?

MR. [Mike] HUCKABEE: I supported the president when he led us into this, as did the Democrats. And I think we owe him not a lot of scorn; we owe him our thanks that he had the courage to recognize there was a potential of weapons of mass destruction, and whether than wait until we had another attack, he went and made sure that it wasn’t going to happen from Saddam Hussein.

Now, everybody can look back and say, oh, well, we didn’t find the weapons. It doesn’t mean they weren’t there. Just because you didn’t find every Easter egg didn’t mean that it wasn’t planted.


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I got nuthin’.
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Filed under 2008 election, Chimpy, Chris Matthews, CNN, Fox News, George W. Bush, humor, Iraq War, Mike Huckabee, movies, MSNBC, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wolf Blitzer, Wordpress Political Blogs

Tele-con

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – President George W. Bush won a test vote in the U.S. Senate on Thursday on his demand that any telephone company that participated in his warrantless domestic spying program receive immunity from lawsuits.

ispyreturns2
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Filed under 9/11, ACLU, Chimpy, Christopher Dodd, Congress, Democrats, Dick Cheney, George W. Bush, humor, Jay Rockefeller, National Security Agency, NSA, parody, politics, Republicans, Senate Intelligence Committee, September 11, snark, television, Wiretaps, Wordpress Political Blogs