Monthly Archives: September 2009

Oh, the Horror!

From THE GAGGLE at Newsweek:

The last time we saw Tom DeLay, he was a scandal-ridden leper slinking back to Texas with nothing left but that giant, threatening smile that made even people who liked him kind of hate him. He had lost it all─his post as house majority leader, his congressional seat, his standing reservation at Signatures, Jack Abramoff’s expense-account lunchery for Republicans headed for ignominy, or prison, or both. Perhaps worst of all, DeLay had lost his mojo as “The Hammer,” the one guy you didn’t dare cross on Capitol Hill and expect to survive. Until the end, he cast himself as a victim of power-hungry Democrats, even though it was Republicans who ultimately threw him overboard. He knew how it worked—after all, he’d done the same thing to Newt Gingrich. And so DeLay went, but he didn’t like it, and like a character straight out of a Sergio Leone spaghetti Western, he promised to get justice and clear his name. “I’ll be back,” DeLay vowed.

Turns out he was right. Last night Tom DeLay made his comeback, and truly, it was a low moment in our nation’s long and stormy history, by which we mean it was totally and completely awesome in every imaginable way.


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Maybe they all need a nap

From THE HILL:

The House and Senate lack the votes to pass President Barack Obama’s healthcare reform proposals, Republican leaders said Sunday, urging the president to “reset” the national health debate.

House Minority Leader John Boehner (R-Ohio) confidently predicted Sunday that the healthcare bills currently before Congress would not survive, while his Senate counterpart warned against using a procedural maneuver to try to force any health bill through Congress.


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(clockwise from Obama:  Michael Phathead Steele, Michele Batshit Bachmann, Lindseypoo Graham, Little Eric Cantor, John Boohoo Boehner, Joe Flash Wilson, Chuck Your Ass Is Grassley, Mitch No Chin McConnell, Max Blue Cross Baucus)
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Filed under Barack Obama, Chuck Grassley, Congress, Constitution, Democrats, humor, John Boehner, Lindsey Graham, Mitch McConnell, movies, parody, politics, Senate, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

You Can’t Spell Prick Without R-I-C-K!

From the Star-Telegram:

In recent months, Gov. Rick Perry has savaged the stimulus package, lambasted federal attempts at healthcare reform and hinted at secession because of federal tax-and-spend policies.

A Web site paid for by Perry’s re-election campaign says Washington’s “increasingly pervasive embrace of bailouts . . . must be stopped before it drowns us in debt and destroys our national tradition of self-reliance.” The governor has also said that accepting federal stimulus money would burden the state with programs Texas couldn’t sustain.

Then, on June 19, Perry applauded the state’s “balanced” budget, which he’d just signed, noting that lawmakers had left the state’s Rainy Day Fund untouched and had cut taxes for 40,000 small businesses.

Some people credit conservative fiscal leadership by Perry, who vetoed $288.9 million in spending, and by lawmakers for balancing the budget.

But records show that it was the much reviled federal stimulus money that saved the day.


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Filed under Barack Obama, Democrats, humor, Medicaid, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Texas, Wordpress Political Blogs

Oklahoma, Not OK

From News9:

OKLAHOMA CITY — Only one in four Oklahoma public high school students can name the first President of the United States, according to a survey released today.

The survey was commissioned by the Oklahoma Council of Public Affairs in observance of Constitution Day on Thursday.

Brandon Dutcher is with the conservative think tank and said the group wanted to find out how much civic knowledge Oklahoma high school students know.


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Filed under Congress, Constitution, Health and Human Services Department, humor, James Inhofe, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Supreme Court, Tom Coburn, Wordpress Political Blogs

If you’re stupid, and you know it, flap your lips!

From MEDIA MATTERS:

Today, in a long speech on the House floor, Rep. Phil Gingrey (R-GA) laid out his case against health care reform. On top of the usual talk about a “government takeover” and “socialized medicine,” Gingrey stressed his belief that, in the midst of a recession, improving the nation’s ailing health care system shouldn’t be President Obama’s top priority. Gingrey acknowledged that 14,000 Americans are losing their health insurance every day, but literally laughed off the notion that this constitutes a health care crisis. Rather, he said, “14,000 people are losing their health insurance every day NOT because of the cost of health insurance [laughs], they’re losing it because they lost their job!”

Yeah, Phil, that’s just hilarious!!


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Filed under Barack Obama, Congress, humor, Joe Lieberman, movies, parody, politics, Racism, radio, Republicans, Rush Limbaugh, Senate, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Insurance Companies Get the MAXimum Bang for Their Buck

From THINK PROGRESS:

Earlier this morning Senate Finance Committee Chair Max Baucus (D-MT) unveiled his committee’s health care bill, which has no public option and mandates that everyone buy insurance. While Baucus has failed to garner support from any congressional Republicans and has outraged progressives, there has been one very positive response to his proposal.

Following Baucus’ announcement, HealthNet shares increased by 3%, United Health Group Inc shares rose by 2.7%, Humana Inc. grew by 2.6%, Wellpoint stock gained 1.7% and Aetna Inc rose 1.6%


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Filed under Barack Obama, Bill Nelson, Chimpy, George W. Bush, humor, Jay Rockefeller, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Senate Finance Committee, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

From Scooby-Doo to Just Plain Doo-Doo

From The Boston Globe:

Happy birthday, Scooby-Doo.

Forty falls ago, the cartoon canine and his human cohorts – fellow chicken-heart and chowhound Shaggy, brainy Velma, curvaceous Daphne, and Freddie, the unofficial leader of the gang – debuted on Saturday morning television. From the age of Nixon to the age of Obama, they’ve exposed seemingly supernatural monsters as human criminals in disguise, many of whom, upon being unmasked, curse those “meddling kids’’ and their dog.

Kids, I apologize for allowing this momentous occasion to pass without a word. Perhaps I blocked out this happy news, because I was thinking about another cartoon enterprise that was a major failure. Yes, I’m talking about GOP Wingnut Studio’s knockoff (because they haven’t had an original idea in decades) Scooby-Don’t.

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