Yearly Archives: 2009

C-section on C Street?

I’m never going to talk about that with anybody. I never will, not to a court of law, not to an ethics committee, not to anybody — because that is privileged communication that I will never reveal to anybody.

That was said by Senator Tom Coburn. He won’t tell on John Ensign, because Coburn’s a physician, and he’s playing the doctor/patient confidentiality card. Yes, Tom is a doctor. He’s an ob/gyn. That can only mean one thing. Congratulations, Senator Ensign!! When are you due?

junior2
Original DVD cover.
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Filed under Christianity, FBI, humor, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Scandals, snark, Tom Coburn, Wordpress Political Blogs

The Sarah Palin Chronicles: First Secession, Now Succession

From KTUU:

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — As confusion over who is legally bound to assume the role of lieutenant governor after Gov. Sarah Palin resigns later this month continues, the House Judiciary Committee announced it will hold a hearing next week.

Committee Chair Jay Ramras, R-Fairbanks, issued a statement Wednesday saying that his group will consider Lt. Gen. Craig Campbell, commissioner of the Department of Military and Veterans Affairs, to be the next lieutenant governor-designee.

“The governor quit and went fishing,” Ramras said in the statement. “Governor Palin failed to leave specific instructions, so the Legislature is stepping in to bring order to the constitutional chaos she created.”


Original DVD cover.
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Filed under Alaska, Constitution, House Judiciary Committee, humor, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Witless Protection Program, Part 2

In Part 1, we saw how the Princess Protection Program put Princess Sarah Palin in an undisclosed location along with her friend and political tutor, Batshit Michele Bachmann. After a couple of years of fishing and conspiracy theorizing and studying the names of magazines and newspapers just in case Katie Couric asks Princess those tricky questions again, the dynamic duo of dodoheads is almost ready to reenter the public arena. All that’s left to do is a royal makeover.


Original book cover.
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Filed under 2008 election, Books, humor, Katie Couric, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Ronald Reagan, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

The Witless Protection Program

I don’t know about you, kids, but I’m worried sick over Princess Sarah Palin’s future now that she’s told the people of Alaska to go f#¢k themselves stepped down from the governorship of Alaska. It’s been keeping me up nights, and since there’s not a damned thing on TV in the middle of the night other than informercials and commercials for wee-wee extenders, I’ve come up with a plan for her. First, she needs to have one last hurrah amongst her most fervent supporters. They include Bill Kristol (who likes to use parentheses), Elisabeth I’ll Tell You My View as Soon as I Get the Fax Hasselbeck, Rich I Touch Myself Lowry, Rush The Boss Limbaugh, and Greta I Am So Friggin’ in Love with Todd Van Susteren.  Of course, Captain Underpants John McCain will have to show up, because he can’t admit he was wrong in choosing her for his running mate. Once the adulation is over, though, it’s off to the Princess Protection Program!


Original book cover.
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Filed under 2008 election, Alaska, Books, Dick Cheney, Greta Van Susteren, humor, John McCain, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Holy Mackerel!

Only dead fish go with the flow.

–Sarah Palin July 3, 2009

From Eugene Robinson at The Washington Post:

What can you say about a public official who ridicules those who would take the “quitter’s way out” — as she faces reporters to announce that she’s quitting? A governor who claims that “the worthless, easy path” would be to serve out the remaining 18 months of her term? An ambitious politician who says that “life is too short” to worry about, you know, boring things such as responsibility or duty?

You can say that all of us who ever took Sarah Palin seriously — or pretended to take her seriously — should be deeply ashamed. And you can say that John McCain should publicly apologize for putting the nation he loves at risk by choosing Palin as his running mate.


Original DVD cover.

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Filed under 2008 election, Alaska, humor, John McCain, Media, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

The only thing she doesn’t quit is quitting!

From Michael Carey at the Los Angeles Times (Op-Ed):

Reporting from Anchorage — Sarah Palin’s career as governor of Alaska is over. So is her barely begun career as a serious presidential candidate. The road map to the White House doesn’t include a stop at “I quit.”

In a truly Palinesque moment near the end of her speech in Wasilla on Friday, the departing governor quoted a saying she said her parents kept on their refrigerator. “Don’t explain: Your friends don’t need it, and your enemies won’t believe you anyway.”

The governor might have done better to take her cue from another piece of refrigerator wisdom: “Quitters never win, and winners never quit.”


Original DVD cover.
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Filed under Alaska, Frank Murkowski, humor, Lisa Murkowski, Media, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Press Mess Causes Stress

From POLITICO (July 3, 2009):

Washington Post publisher Katharine Weymouth said today she was canceling plans for an exclusive “salon” at her home where for as much as $250,000, the Post offered lobbyists and association executives off-the-record access to “those powerful few” — Obama administration officials, members of Congress, and even the paper’s own reporters and editors.

The astonishing offer was detailed in a flier circulated Wednesday to a health care lobbyist, who provided it to a reporter because the lobbyist said he felt it was a conflict for the paper to charge for access to, as the flier says, its “health care reporting and editorial staff.”


Original DVD cover
(bottom l to r: Dana Milbank, Howard Kurtz, Michael Shear)
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Filed under Barack Obama, Congress, Democrats, humor, Media, Media Matters, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs