If You Think BP’s Honest, You Don’t Know Dudley…I mean, Diddly!

From The Washington Post:

Meet BP’s Bob Dudley, the human relief well.

This week the Mississippi-bred, wispy-haired Dudley has been paraded through the Gulf coast, the White House and press corps as the new face of BP’s fight to contain the damage the oil spill has unleashed on U.S. shores — and the company’s reputation.

Why do I get the feeling that the emphasis will be on the company’s rep, not the damage that’s already been done and will be done?


Original DVD cover

But it will take more than Dudley’s calm demeanor and American accent to clean up BP’s image, which has been blackened by the relentless video of oil gushing into the Gulf of Mexico, the widening damage to the environment and reams of damning documents about the rig accident that triggered the spill.

Even Dudley realizes that. “We can understand why the nation is angry with BP,” he told a group of reporters Thursday. He added, “until we close the well off, I think there’s a period here where its going to be very difficult to restore BP’s reputation.”

He can understand why we’re pissed?Ā  They sent us a genius!

Since the April 20 blowout, hundreds of BP employees have been rushed to the Gulf coast to do everything from consulting on ways to plug the leak to coordinating cleanup. Now BP wants some of them to go back to their regular jobs, while hiring outsiders who might be better suited to running a cleanup operation.

Somewhere in there, I’m reading that other people will work for less money.

Fixing up disasters, Dudley said, “is not a core competency with us.” He said that he hoped to bring in James Lee Witt, who was director of the Federal Emergency Management Agency under President Bill Clinton.

…snip…

Dudley will report to Hayward, who will return to running the rest of the company after devoting the past two months to the spill.

…snip…

Dudley said that by setting up a dedicated division for the oil spill, BP was making a long-term commitment, not limiting its liabilities. He said all 33 claims offices would remain open and be used by Kenneth Feinberg, administrator of the new $20 billion escrow fund set up at the White House’s behest last week.

He said he would support changes such as adding blimps to help guide skimming boats to oil sheens in the Gulf and paying business claims a month in advance rather than retrospectively so businesses in the region could function better.

…snip…

Though BP announced three weeks ago that it intended to set up an oil spill unit, administration officials at the White House meeting last Wednesday asked that the plan be put into effect immediately, Dudley said. He will be a key link between BP and the administration. In a meeting Thursday, Environmental Protection Agency administrator Lisa Jackson told Dudley that she wanted additional tests near the spill site. Interior Secretary Ken Salazar talked about what progress was required before the deepwater drilling moratorium is lifted.

…snip…

Born in Queens, N.Y., to a Navy officer, Dudley moved to Hattiesburg, Miss., at age 5 when his father became a professor at the University of Southern Mississippi. Dudley says “all my childhood memories are from there.” He spent summers on the coast.

A chemical engineer, he worked for 19 years at Amoco, which in 1998 was taken over by BP. At BP, Dudley worked on strategy and became one of then chief executive John Browne’s “turtles,” executive assistants who were groomed for higher posts. In 2003, Dudley moved to Russia to take over TNK-BP, a lucrative joint venture with Russian partners.

I wonder if Princess Sarah saw him from her house!

Most recently, Dudley has worked out of BP headquarters in London. On May 1, during a visit to India, he received a call to help with the spill response; now, he said, he will live out of a suitcase.

Like Hayward, Dudley said he didn’t have an opinion about the cause of the oil spill. “I haven’t read even our internal investigation on this,” he said. He noted, however, that many people weren’t waiting for the investigations to be complete. “There is sort of a rush to justice,” he said.

So let me get this straight.Ā  Bo Diddley…I mean, Bob Dudley grew up in the area that’s been devastated by the disaster, and he never got curious enough over the past 2 months to read a report and find out what happened?Ā  Oh yeah, this will end well.

Advertisements

14 Comments

Filed under Bill Clinton, Democrats, Environment, FEMA, humor, Interior Department, movies, parody, politics, Russia, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

14 responses to “If You Think BP’s Honest, You Don’t Know Dudley…I mean, Diddly!

  1. jeb

    A rush to justice? Really? I haven’t seen a rush to anything except extensive ass-covering which this seems to be more of.

    • how long before it’s no longer classified as “a rush”? i would think that 70 days is long enough, especially when eyewitnesses have said that chunks of the blowout preventer were coming up the pipe.

  2. jenn/ jlms qkw

    it’s sad that my 8yo son knows more about this bp-fuck up and also our local chevron spill than this big exec does.

    let’s put my son in charge. heh. legos for everyone, and no one gets dessert until they clean their plates.

    • it’s what you call willful ignorance. why on earth would the guy who is being put in charge of fixing the problem completely avoid any reports about why the disaster happened in the first place? none of them want to perjure themselves in front of congress, so they make sure they know nothing. i would trust your darling son and his legos to fix this mess before i’d trust anyone from bp.

      • jeb

        yep Nons, plausible deniability. As Gonzo and Bu$hco showed, ignorance is a virtue instead of the badge of shame it should be.

        • unfortunately for bp, their plausible deniability is only making them look even more out of touch and uncaring. while i hate that the disaster happened, i’m very glad that big oil and corporate execs can no longer make a secret of their arrogance and disregard for anything other than money.

  3. Word has it that Dud had to bail out of Russia after a falling out with the billionaire gangsters who own all the former commie stuff. The explanation of the week has got to be the Florida preacher claiming that the usurper blackamoor did all this on purpose to anger Israel! Noted old fart Hal Lindsay says it has to be true because we have turned our back and must recieve holy retribution. And now the Princess has decided to start with the nazi tourettes routine because the Prez didn’t go through the courts. Sure, who isn’t ready to wait 20 to 40 years for a damage award that a goper Supreme court will overturn. Why don’t those people get a job!!

    • i read that story about duds earlier today. sounds like a movie of the week with the obligatory escape at the end.

      princess got nazi tourettes, because she has to distract people from her legal problems. how much you want to bet she never read the article and only heard about it from glenn blechhhh or one of the other morans?

  4. Joanaroo

    Fixing up disasters is not a core competency with us. LMAO! I almost snorted up a tonsil over that one. Obviously with all the fingerpointing, evasion, denial and just plain incompetence, we know what good Dudley will do. (Love the DVD cover, Nonnie!). What I’d like to know is, what do bp (beyond pathetic) big shots get paid big bucks to do anyway?

    • i almost choked when i read that line, too, joanaroo! we don’t fix up disasters, we just make ’em! glad you like the cover. do you like duds’s shirt? took me forever to make that damned thing. if bp (bush’s pals) ever sell them in their gift store, i’m going to sue them for royalties. same thing goes for tony’s shirt that i made the other day. i already got a request for that shirt. šŸ˜‰

  5. Excellent cover nonnie, right down to the parody of “universal” laughingstock; only it’s getting harder and harder to laugh at these assholes.

    What really makes me angry is the realization none of them will get criminally prosecuted; the bar was reset so low by letting war criminals Dick-Bush walk that we can forget about any accountability for destroying the ocean(s).

    • thanks terry! šŸ™‚

      i’ve used universal laughingstock quite a number of times, and i’m still not really laughing. šŸ˜¦

      i’m still hoping that someone somewhere along the line will be prosecuted. maybe i’m just one of those cockeyed optimists like in the old song. i just hope it’s not some low-level working shmuck who gets indicted. at least even bp is smart enough not to try to pin the fault on one of the men who died.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s