The Macaca Awards!

Welcome to the 1st Semi-Regular Macaca Awards!  I’ll borrow the introduction from my collaborator, the handsome and talented Tengrain of Mock, Paper, Scissors:

It seems so long ago that George Allen uttered the words that moved a generation (and sank his political career), and forever seared the word Macaca into our collective brain.
And so we honor all that is appalling in American Politics with the First Semi-Regular Macaca Awards.

Nightly, starting tomorrow night and concluding on Election Eve, you will be able to vote for the biggest Macaca in different categories. Nonnie and Tengrain will announce the winners on Election Eve, so this is democracy in action! Everyone is eligible to vote, no Arizonastan Juan Crow laws here, fellow citizens!


(Image courtesy of Tengrain)
And now, for the first category and the nominees…

For Outstanding Achievement in Grifting, the nominees are:

Original DVD cover

Princess Sarah Palin, who lost a Vice Presidential big, but won a brand new wardrobe and has gone on to dupe stupid people out of their money and make herself a millionaire.

Joe Miller, he’s a hypocrite and a liar.  Is it any wonder Princess Sarah endorsed him?

Christine O’Donnell, who can’t field-dress a moose, but she can insert a human brain into a mouse, all while paying her rent and personal expenses with campaign funds.

Full-sized images will appear here at the Raisin, but click here to vote.

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40 Comments

Filed under Alaska, humor, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

40 responses to “The Macaca Awards!

  1. jean-philippe

    It’s pretty obvious “witch” should win this year…

  2. Kip

    This is a great idea! I had to go with O’Donnell. She’s sure to sweep the Wiccan vote.

  3. That’s a sassy swish in Allen’s hip! Can I vote more than once, or is it once a day, once a week?

    • a lot of the rethugs are rather swishy. his wrist looks rather limp, too. jus’ sayin’.

      i don’t think you can vote more than once per category. when i went back, i got a funky-looking screen that said i had already voted. howevah, i don’t know anything about the polling. you’d have to ask tengrain.

      • Great poster, too, btw. I think Christine deserves the award. I read the Gawker’s quasi penthouse piece by a guy who got naked with Christine. He said the waxing trend hadn’t caught up to her, and he was frightened by the enormous 1970s muff (3 years ago).

        • thanks. that’s a poster i kept meaning to make, and then something would happen, and i’d forget. this was the perfect excuse to finally make it.

          i read the article at gawker, and i think it was really rather stupid. i would even have some sympathy for her, except she played that whole ‘mike castle is gay’ crap, so she deserves what she gets.

          • I do feel sorry for in that way, WOW, what a pitiful, lost soul. On the other hand, she’s the one who made her sexuality and everybody else’s an issue.

            • i think the article was rather stupid and misogynistic, and it bothers me that someone stooped to that level. howevah, i think there’s a touch of poetic justice that some guy is making a few bucks by dishing on a grifter.

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  5. jeb

    This is a tough one. How did you boil it down to just three candidates? Where’s the Obtuse one or Randy Paul? The stupidity runs up and down all levels and Teabaggery has given people license to all hate openly again. Why even this school board guy in Arkansas deserves consideration although someone convinced him to pretend that he was contrite.

    http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/10/28/arkansas.anti.gay.resignation/index.html?hpt=C1

  6. jeb

    Categories? I’ve never gotten the whole awards show concept,

  7. Aunt Snow

    I think for pure magnitude alone, the Grifter Crown belongs to Sarah. Joe and Chrissie may be good, but their take doesn’t come anywhere near that of Palin. She’s the champeen!

    • hello aunt snow,

      welcome to the raisin! 😀

      i agree that, moneywise, princess sarah has the edge on both of them. howevah, i think she lucked into it. she’s always been a grifter in her soul, but she really got a taste of it when she had the rnc mastercard tucked in her hand. so she’s made plenty of money and kept herself in the headlines, but, like i said, it was luck. little chrissie, on the other hand, has made this her lifestyle for more than 20 years, so she wins for longevity. it’s difficult to choose. we can take solace, though, in the fact that no matter which one wins, one of the others will be there to steal the prize from him/her.

  8. LongTimeObserver

    A target rich environment. So tough to choose.

  9. Dimitrios

    At this present time the Macaca Awards may only be considering party sanctioned sphincters, and have other awards pending for lesser lights, but just in case you do not, I should like to propose my own candidate. Alternately, if you are planning a special category for amateur assholes, please consider my nominee’s inclusion there.

    In a single act of his previously unremarkable life, Rand Paul supporter Tiny Tim Profitt catapulted himself into the running by setting his large, Bozoish shoe on the neck of MoveOn.org’s Lauren Valle. A remarkable feat which was bent into an act of piquant irony by the fact that Mr. Profitt, at that moment, was wearing a “Don’t Tread on Me” button pinned to the chest of his size 60 shirt. To further cement himself into his newfounded leading wanker role, he demanded that Ms. Valle apologize to him. (I am still attempting to discover the key to Mr. Profitt’s logic, so I might convey his thoughts properly to a third party.)

    When sufficiently conscious to make a statement, Ms. Valle averred that she was never closer than five feet to the easily-endangered Rand Paul and was moving away from the crowd. Nonetheless, it appears that, in the estimation of our impatient Mr. Profitt, the young lady from MoveOn.org was not moving on with sufficient speed, so Tiny Tim unleashed the Florsheims of doom.

    I give you Tiny Tim Profitt, a shoe-in to win the Macaca Award for Amateur Asshole in an Egregiously Bellicose Supporting Role.

    • you always make me laugh, dimitrious. this round of semi-regular macaca awards is going to be a short one, and there are so many categories we could have included. we wanted the awards ceremony to be on election night, so we’re limiting the categories. this election season has been so bizarre that it was really difficult to figure out what the categories should be, and we didn’t know what the response would be. it seems that raisinettes and scissorheads are having fun with it, so maybe we can have another round soon.

      • jeb

        Nonnie, no awards show can be complete without a “best costume” category which I’m confident will be won hands down by Richard (does this black uniform make my ass look fat?) Iott.

  10. I voted for Sarah for lifetime achievement. Prissy Chrissie may have been at it for longer, but she hasn’t earned the big bucks.

    • i would agree with you if it had been a matter of skill instead of luck. little chrissie managed to not get charged with fraud or at the very least have to pay a fine for so many years, while princess just fell into grifting. yes, she took to it like a fish to water, but it was still mostly luck. little chrissie had to work at it.

  11. palin is the obvious choice – she relishes her grifterness……

    but for shear chutzpah in grifterness i go with carly fiorina — the woman touts her ability to help a state after she ran an entire billion dollar company into the ground..

    plus she is very very annoying…..

    and mccain fired her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  13. Too late to vote damit! Last time I saw a white lawn jockey was that 70s Lampoon cover showing two negro gentlemen holding paper bag wraped wine bottles while sitting on an inner city stoop with the lj down on the sidewalk. Truly classic.

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