Crappy Birthday

All this nonsense about how this would have been Ronald Reagan’s 100th birthday is really getting to me. No matter where you turn, there’s Nancy or the Rethuglicans pushing the St. Ronnie myth. As if it’s not bad enough that everything is being named after St. Ronnie, but they’re putting statues of him all over the place. Is it any wonder I’m upset? It all started this morning when I woke up in a cold sweat after having this nightmare…

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I tried to shake it off, got out of bed, and headed to the bathroom…

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😯  I have to get dressed! Where are my shoes?

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😯 Β  Did you see what’s inside those shoes?

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Let me grab some breakfast and get out of here.

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😯 Β Β  Oh, fer chrissakes! Never mind, I’ll go out for breakfast.

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To be continued…


Filed under Advertising, humor, parody, politics, Republicans, Ronald Reagan, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

26 responses to “Crappy Birthday

  1. Friend of the court

    i’m surprised that they didn’t dig up the gipper and fly him back and forth to DC 3 or 4 times.

  2. jeb

    It sounds like a bad case of Ronarhea.

  3. I remember Prez Ron as the guy who came up with the plastic government cheese, he declared ketchup a “vegetable”, and when arms for hostages legal issues came up, he suddenly “could not recall” what he remembered when.
    He started the whole deregulation debacle, and he found cost saving by releasing mentally ill people out on the streets to fend for themselves. In true movie actor style he touted his Trickle down economics (pissing on the poor people)- he wound up taxing middle & lower classes more & he left his presidency with a $200 + billion dollar deficit.
    Not exactly the stuff one would associate with the term “Saint”.

    • you didn’t know ketchup is really a vegetable smoothie? i almost feel sorry for the rethugs. they need a hero, so they have to reinvent ronnie and then canonize him. i think it will come back to bite them in the ass. this is the age of the internets, and the younger voters will find out the truth about st. ronnie, and they won’t like him either.

  4. I posted about the intersections between my life and Ray-gun’s on my personal blog.

    Also, given how much you hated Twilight, you might be amused that it’s up for Worst Picture at the Grazzies.

  5. I suffer from ‘can’t get away from him,” too. He’s a true zombie! Isnn’t there a way?

    • remember when another untalented actor was canonized? well, they just remade true grit, so john wayne’s not untouchable. neither is reagan. the rethugs will try and try, but the internets are too powerful, so they won’t get away with rewriting st. ronnie’s story.

  6. Funny stuff Nonnie, although that first one gives me issues. Back when Ronnie croaked (not like our world famous Calaveras frogs that are croaking right now) my good pal TJ told me of his uber right wing religio-mother who videotaped the entire tour-the-country-with-the-corpse extravaganza. Just the kind of thing you want to watch over and over! I believe you captured the true essence of Queen Nancy in the Buster Brown ad. Do you really wear sensible shoes? Be careful, people talk.

    • my mom loves a good funeral. every time there’s one on tv, she’s glued to the set. even she eventually couldn’t wait for them to throw ronnie into the ground. i didn’t think they’d ever throw the dirt over him.
      p.s. i always wear sensible shoes, because i have completely insensible feet.

  7. Oh my God. Ha ha ha ha. That first one is just wrong πŸ˜›

  8. I rememer seeing those pointy things in the old department store catalogs. They were scary looking to an impressionable child like myself. Are they sharp? Would they poke your eyes out?? And speaking of everyones favorite fizzy bromine, we see Speedy is back from the rehab labor farm. Maybe soon we’ll see Bucky Beaver and that dancing bear for Hamms beer. (how old IS this guy?) Dancing Old Gold ciggies, anyone?

  9. Pingback: Crappy Birthday, Part 4: The Last Straw | HYSTERICAL RAISINS