Rethuglicans Peddlin’ It All Over Iowa


DES MOINES — Stylistic differences in the developing 2012 Republican presidential campaign began to appear during a conference of conservatives here over the weekend that included five potential candidates.

The five prospects who spoke at the conference Saturday sponsored by Iowa Rep. Steve King focused primarily on their opposition to President Obama and his policy initiatives.

I’ve obtained a photograph of the event from one of my unimpeachable anonymous sources who swiped borrowed this from the event’s photo album .

Original photograph

But Minnesota Rep. Michele Bachmann, former U.S. House speaker Newt Gingrich and former Godfather’s Pizza CEO Herman Cain said in their speeches that Republicans must focus both on social values and economic issues during the 2012 campaign.

Meanwhile, Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour focused solely on fiscal conservatism and the economy, never mentioning cultural issues dear to many in the Republican caucus base.


The fifth possible candidate, former United Nations ambassador John Bolton, focused on foreign policy.


Barbour’s positions on social issues are in line with most conservatives. But in his speech, he cited only Obama’s domestic policies as points of disagreement.

Gingrich argued that public education curriculum in the United States ought to include teaching that the nation’s foundation is based in Christian faith.

“I don’t care what the ACLU says; they should teach it accurately, that we hold these truths to be self evident that we are endowed by our creator,” Gingrich said, stressing the word “creator.”


Filed under ACLU, Barack Obama, Christianity, humor, Iowa, John Bolton, Newt Gingrich, parody, politics, religion, Republicans, snark, United Nations, Wordpress Political Blogs

22 responses to “Rethuglicans Peddlin’ It All Over Iowa

  1. Heh. Newtie said “endowed.”



  2. jean-philippe

    It’s going to be messy in Iowa with all these nuts fighting for the same votes… This is gonna be fun…

  3. jeb

    Newt really needs your money votes now.

  4. Ha! A circus indeed- looks a bit like the island of misfits.
    Newt Waxing poetic with the Declaration of Independence ?
    Ugh! I think I’m gonna be sick!

    Figures he would leave this part out:

    certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

  5. Fortunately, it’s early. It’s likely that none of these nitwits will be the GOP nominee.

    • but they’ll be saying a lot of stupid shit, and the people who are real contenders will have to either defend the shit or piss off the wingnuts who eat it up.

      • jeb

        Stupid shit indeed and Newtie is jumping out ahead of the pack. I saw where he spoke to the Hagee nutcase church in Texas and lamented that his grandchildren could grow up in an aetheistic America controlled by radical Islamists. WTF?!!!!!

        • he never mentions that the mothers of those grandchildren were the ones he didn’t give a shit about feeding or housing when they were still kids. even radical atheist islamists take care of their kids.

  6. Who says vaudeville is dead! We can put that Grinch-cycle act on right after the regugitator and just before the guy who balences budgets on sticks. He might want to lose some of the clowns.

  7. afrankangle

    Circus is a good description, but vaudeville is priceless. Good thing about Iowa and South Carolina, they could thin the field. Then again, what they endorse could be the bad thing.

    • i hate, hate, hate, hate 😡 that the rest of the country only gets to choose from whatever iowa, south carolina, and new hampshire think are the best choices.

    • “Everybodys trying to get in on the act” as Durante would say. And don’t miss the closing act when Tex does his spelling bit he learnt in Taxes scool.

      • they all want to get into the act, but not too soon. they had to reschedule the rethug primary debate at the st. ronnie liberry from may to september, because only timmeh pawlenty has officially declared.