A Grimm Tale of Spinning Straw Into a Bad Hair Weave

I was calling you-know-who Hairy Cheez Doodle, but I have changed my mind. He’s got a new name now.

From CNN:

Davenport, Iowa (CNN)Donald Trump, after hearing speeches at the Democratic convention this week, said Thursday he wanted to “hit a number of those speakers so hard, their heads would spin.”

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Russian Undressing

From NPR:

Why would Russian President Vladimir Putin want to help Donald Trump win the White House?

That’s the accusation from Democrats this week, after embarrassing internal Democratic National Committee emails appeared on Wikileaks on the eve of the party’s convention in Philadelphia.

The emails were lifted earlier this year in a hacking breach that security experts have linked to Russian espionage groups.

I think it’s the GOP that made a rookie mistake

From THE WASHINGTON POST:

WASHINGTON — Alarm and condemnation erupted Thursday from European capitals, the White House and leaders of Donald Trump’s own party after the Republican presidential nominee suggested the United States might abandon its NATO military commitments if he were elected president.

Senate Republican leader Mitch McConnell, who backed Trump at the party’s national convention only two days earlier, said he totally disagreed with the statement but was willing to “chalk it up to a rookie mistake.”

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An Uncivil Union

From FORTUNE:

Donald Trump and his running mate, Indiana Governor Mike Pence, don’t have much in common—politically, philosophically or personally. And their awkward marriage was on full display in the first interview the two gave together on Sunday on “60 Minutes.”

“It’s probably obvious to people we have different styles,” Pence, who served six terms in Congress, told Lesley Stahl.

Kids, Fortune is being waaaaayyyyy too polite. It was a disaster! Every time Plain Dry Melba Toast Pence opened his mouth, Hairy Cheez Doodle cut him off and answered for him. Lesley Stahl just giggled as the journalism deities wept. Anyway, I was lucky enough to nab a picture of the new couple warming up before they started taping.

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One Ring-A-Dingy

From BuzzFeed NEWS:

At Mar-a-Lago, the Palm Beach resort he runs as a club for paying guests and celebrities, Donald Trump had a telephone console installed in his bedroom that acted like a switchboard, connecting to every phone extension on the estate, according to six former workers. Several of them said he used that console to eavesdrop on calls involving staff.

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