The Beer Facts

You have to wonder what the FBI will be investigating now that Senator Jeff Flake had a moment of conscience or courage (or if he is playing a game like Susan Collins was when she voted Betsy Wetsy DeVos out of committee knowing she would have enough votes to be confirmed even though Susie voted against her. But I digress…). I’m hoping they look into his Georgetown Prep yearbook references.

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From MATTHEW ZEITLIN at SLATE:

It probably was neither Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse’s or Brett Kavanaugh’s proudest moment when the Rhode Island Democrat asked the Supreme Court nominee to explain what a “devil’s triangle” was, referring to a note in Kavanaugh’s now-infamous Georgetown Prep yearbook. An exasperated Kavanaugh claimed it was a drinking game with “three glasses in a triangle,” similar to Quarters. Right.

This was just one example where Kavanaugh offered the most innocent possible explanation for his yearbook entries that a reasonable person would read as references to sex or excessive drinking. It’s not a stretch to say most of Kavanaugh’s explanations don’t pass the smell test.

Take devil’s triangle. While it’s remotely possible that Kavanaugh and his friends used an idiosyncratic definition, the euphemism typically refers to a threesome with two men and one woman. This is directly pertinent to Christine Blasey Ford’s allegation for obvious reasons.

…snip…

And then there’s boof. The reference in the yearbook is “Judge—Have You Boofed Yet?” That’s his friend Mark Judge, the alleged witness to the assault on Ford and, by his own admission, a man with a severe drinking problem at the time. Yet Kavanaugh said in the midst of testimony, during which he mentioned his past and present fondness for beer dozens of times, that he was referring to “flatulence.” Oh, please.

In the yearbook, “Boofed” came right before “Beach Week Ralph Club—Biggest Contributor,” a superlative Kavanaugh said he earned not necessarily because of heavy drinking but because “I’m known to have a weak stomach … whether it’s with beer or with spicy food or anything.” When Whitehouse pursued the “Ralph Club” question further, Kavanaugh cut off any discussion of his possible excessive drinking with a recitation of his résumé. When Whitehouse tried to bring him around back to alcohol consumption—”Did it relate to alcohol? You haven’t answered that.”—Kavanaugh said, “I like beer. I like beer. I don’t know if you do” and “Do you like beer, Senator, or not?” Do you?!

…snip…

Look, it feels silly to parse yearbook notations that are, literally, juvenalia. But it matters: One of the only ways to square Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony with Kavanaugh’s adamant denials is to presume that he attacked her while he was so drunk he later blacked out and had no memory of doing so. The crass sexism in these references is relevant too, as Kavanaugh has referred numerous times to his respect for women and friendship with women in high school, college, and beyond as a reason to not believe Ford’s account.

A straight-A student with a close knit group of friends who enjoyed some beers on a summer weekend before going off to Yale sounds like someone who could be a Supreme Court justice. A binge-drinking football player who, along with his friends, boasted of their supposed sexual exploits at the expense of women sounds like something else entirely.

And let’s not FFFFFFForget “I Survived the FFFFFFFourth of July.” According to the Urban Dictionary, it’s short for Find them, French them, Feel them, Finger them, Fuck them, Forget them, Forever.

Isn’t that special?