Category Archives: Congress

Bullshit Sessions

Well, kids, the worst has happened (until the next worst happens), and Jeff Beauregard Sessions is now the Attorney General of the United States. Since the Department of Justice has a new dickhead, it should have a new seal to reflect his values.

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Filed under Attorney General, Congress, humor, Immigration, Justice Department, Muslims, parody, politics, Republicans, Russia, satire, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

The Turtle and the Hair

Hey, kids, remember how quiet Yertle McConnell has been when it comes to all the shit spewing out of Hair Furor’s mouth and President Steve Bannon’s pen? Well, I guess the honeymoon is finally over. A straw finally broke the elephant’s back.

From USA TODAY ON POLITICS:

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said he doesn’t view Russian President Vladimir Putin in the same way that President Trump does.

During an interview on CNN’s State of the Union, the Kentucky Republican called Putin a “thug” and former KGB agent who was not elected in a way most would consider “a credible election.” Putin also invaded the sovereign nation of Ukraine and “messed around in our elections,” said McConnell.

 

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Filed under Barack Obama, Bill O'Reilly, Congress, FBI, humor, Immigration, movies, Nancy Pelosi, parody, politics, Russia, satire, Senate, snark, Vladimir Putin, Wordpress Political Blogs

Checks & Balances? The checks all bounced, and they’re all unbalanced!

From Newsweek:

One of the great questions of Donald Trump’s presidency is how well he’ll get along with House Speaker Paul Ryan and more traditional conservatives. If the president’s meeting with congressional Republicans in Philadelphia on Thursday is any indication, the answer is they’ll do very well.

One of my sources on the inside at the retreat sent me a picture of the  Commander In Chief  Demander-and-Thief and what seems to be (from this picture) the Streaker of the House.

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Filed under Barack Obama, Congress, humor, Painting, politics, Republicans, satire, Senate, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Chuckleberry’s Joke Goes Viral

From THE HUFFINGTON POST:

Zika virus is no laughing matter ― unless, apparently, you’re Mike Huckabee warming up the crowd at a Donald Trump rally.

The former Arkansas governor and failed Republican presidential candidate mocked concerns over the devastating virus so he could take a potshot at Trump’s Democratic rival, Hillary Clinton, during a Wednesday evening rally for Trump in Sunrise, Florida.

“I’m a lot more afraid of a Hillary Clinton presidency than I am of getting a mosquito bite in South Florida,” Huckabee said.

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Filed under Congress, Florida, Hillary Clinton, humor, Mike Huckabee, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, satire, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Silence Is Not Golden

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From HUFFPOST POLITICS:

Rep. Jim Himes (D-Conn.) said he won’t be attending any more moments of silence on the House floor after mass shootings, arguing that they have become an excuse for Congress not to take any real action to address gun violence.

Himes’ tweet came Sunday night, after the massacre at Pulse nightclub in Orlando, Florida. At least 50 people were killed in what is now the deadliest mass shooting in U.S. history.

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Downton Not-Too-Shabby

From The Washington Post:

The Rayburn House Office Building is a labyrinth of beige offices.

And then, there’s . . . Rep. Aaron Schock’s new digs.

Bright red walls. A gold-colored wall sconce with black candles. A Federal-style bull’s-eye mirror with an eagle perched on top. And this is just the Illinois Republican’s outer office.

“It’s actually based off of the red room in ‘Downton Abbey,’ ” said the woman behind the front desk, comparing it to the luxurious set piece at the heart of the British period drama.

Aaron, Lady Rose and Lady Mary share a giggle over the bill lowly taxpayers have to foot for Aaron’s extravagance.

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Bye Bye Batshit!!!!!

Hi kids!  Long time, no see.  Yeah, I know it’s my fault.  I wouldn’t be here today, but I couldn’t say no to Raisinette FOTC.  She asked me to commemorate the exit of Batshit Bachmann from her too-long tenure in Congress and public life in general.  She requested that I use Bye Bye Birdie and not to mention that she sings Put on a Happy Face in the shower.  OOPS!!  So let me see if I remember how to do this.

From CNN Politics:

Washington (CNN) — Rep. Michele Bachmann says now that she’s leaving Congress, she can “take the handcuffs off.”

…snip…

Bachmann had harsh words for House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio), calling Thursday night’s vote to pass a government funding bill — which Bachmann opposed — the most consequential of her four terms. She voted against the bill Thursday.

She said Boehner had linked arms with President Barack Obama to avert a government shutdown without defunding Obama’s executive action overhauling U.S. immigration rules. “The cake was baked months ago,” she said.

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