Category Archives: Mike Huckabee

Lipstick on a Pygmalion

(CNN) – The campaign veteran who has signed up to run Rep. Michele Bachmann’s expected bid for the Republican presidential nomination says the congresswoman from Minnesota would be a formidable candidate in the Iowa caucuses.

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He Wants to Have His Candy and Eat It, Too

FromPOLITICO:

Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee, who said last month that he had reached the decision not to enter the 2012 race after intense prayer, says that doesn’t take him out of the veepstakes.

“Everything is still open. I haven’t closed doors. I found long ago that that’s not the smart thing to do,” Huckabee told reporters in Little Rock, after a speech at the Clinton Presidential Library.

Huckabee opted against a run for the GOP presidential nomination in mid-May, telling viewers of his Fox News show “My heart says no.”

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2 Idiots, No Waiting

From Bloomberg:

It was supposed to have been a big moment for Representative Michele Bachmann of Minnesota — headlining a Republican dinner in Des Moines, Iowa’s largest city, ahead of a potential presidential campaign announcement next month.

Then a late vote in Congress kept her in Washington last night and a political shadow appeared, as Sarah Palin announced a multiday East Coast campaign-style bus tour that will kick off with a May 29 appearance at a motorcycle rally for veterans in Washington.

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Greasy’s the Word

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, kids, but I read this over at POLITICO:

Indiana Gov. Mitch Daniels told supporters in an email early Sunday that he will not run for president in 2012, a decision he said ultimately came down to his family’s reticence about a campaign.

First Haley Barbour, then Mike xChuckleberryx Huckabee, then Donald Trump, and now ol’ Mitch.  If you’re like me, you’re beside yourself with grief.  Well, I know the only thing that will cheer us all up is a song, so warm up those vocal chords, kids!

To the tune of Beauty School Dropout written by Jim Jacobs and Warren Casey, as performed by Frankie Avalon:

Your story, sad to tell,
A Rethug ne’er-do-well,
Most nasty lying scumbag on the block!


Your future’s so unclear now,
What’s left of your career now?
Can’t even get a trade-in on your bile!

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American Huckstery

From AlterNet:

Mike Huckabee […] has started a project, “Learn Our History,” where on a monthly basis–sort of like BMG or Columbia House music–Huckabee’s organization will send subscribers Time Travel Academy, an animated children’s cartoon featuring a group of intrepid time travelers who teach lessons about U.S. history “without a political bias.”

If judged by its artistic qualities, the cartoon is so poorly done as to be a pitiable joke. Its main characters are a contrived group of multicultural “tweens.” The history is predictable: Ronald Reagan is America’s savior, America is a Judeo-Christian country preordained by God to be exceptional, and flag-waving jingoistic nationalism is a virtue and never a sin. The guiding principle of this right-wing approved version of U.S. history is simple: “What we see and hear isn’t always the same as what we read in books, or see on TV. We know the truth. And that’s good enough for us.”

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The Chuckleberry Charade

All the factors say go, but my heart says no, and that is the decision I have made, and in it, I have finally found resolution.-Mike Huckabee

From Jennifer Rubin at POSTOPINIONS at The Washington Post:

I am not surprised in the least that Mike Huckabee is passing on the 2012 primary. He’s got a great lifestyle, wealth beyond his and his wife’s imagination, and no reason to lessen his speaking value by losing a presidential primary.It was cheesy to hype an announcement and then say, “Never mind.” But no one ever accused Huckabee of going light on the show biz presentation. (Former senator Chuck Hagel, who called reporters together to say he had no news about a 2008 presidential run, has now been bypassed in the “You hauled us out here for this?” category.)

I’m not surprised either. Chuckleberry was always in this just to make money. You get a lot more attention and get paid more for speeches when you make believe that you’re running for president. Chuckleberry was a grifter, and he’s still a grifter.
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The Master Debaters

From Salon:

Buddy Roemer, the one-term Louisiana governor from long ago (whose reelection campaign ended in defeat at the hands of a Klansman), was none too happy when Fox News announced Wednesday that it was barring him from participating in the first Republican presidential debate, to be held in South Carolina Thursday night.

But he may actually be catching a break.

Tonight’s event could well be the first time in history that a nationally televised presidential debate lowers the stature of every participant.

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The Apprent-ass

From Paul Harris at the Mail & Guardian online:

The bright lights of the Las Vegas strip were an apt setting for the Donald Trump carnival roadshow to end up in last week. Amid the garish neon of the gigantic Treasure Island Casino, the business mogul-turned-reality TV star-turned-potential Republican presidential candidate made his latest stop.

Speaking at an event called The Reagan Revolution: From Ronald to Donald, Trump made his pitch to an audience of Nevada Republican bigwigs and curious onlookers in one of the key early-voting states in the nomination process. In the casino’s ballroom, which featured an ice statue of himself, Trump gave a virtuoso performance that was full of braggadocio and littered with expletives. “Our leaders are stupid, they are stupid people,” he said, before referring to the Chinese government as “motherfuckers” against whom he’d raise trade tariffs.

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