His belly is as yellow as his hair

From The Detroit News:

Washington — Secret Service agents rushed President Donald Trump to a White House bunker on Friday night as hundreds of protesters gathered outside the executive mansion, some of them throwing rocks and tugging at police barricades.

Trump spent nearly an hour in the bunker, which was designed for use in emergencies like terrorist attacks, according to a Republican close to the White House who was not authorized to publicly discuss private matters and spoke on condition of anonymity.

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Let Them Eat Caca

From THE HILL:

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) is facing blowback from across the political spectrum after he suggested states should be able to declare bankruptcy as they face severe budget holes sparked by the coronavirus outbreak.

…snip…

But McConnell sparked his own political firestorm when, in response to a question from radio host Hugh Hewitt, he said he supported letting states declare bankruptcy and positioned Republicans as cautious of providing them with additional federal relief.

Original painting (by Élisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun)

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Here we go loop de loo!

From Newsweek:

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has been sent a letter from Joseph Bondy, attorney to Lev Parnas, urging McConnell to allow his client to testify at the ongoing Senate impeachment trial of President Donald Trump.

…snip…

“For the past several months we have diligently pursued an opportunity for Mr. Parnas to provide complete and truthful testimony to the Government and Congress regarding Mr. Parnas’s activities in connection with the efforts of President Trump to secure concessions from Ukraine, in exchange for American aid,” the letter continued.

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High Crimes but No Subpoenas

Twitler grabbed Lamar Alexander by the pussy. “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.”

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R.I.P. Irony

So, kids, are you watching the impeachment trial? I’m having a little trouble doing so, because my cable company keeps changing the channel. Instead of the Twitler impeachment trial, I have seen the impeachment of Hunter Biden, Joe Biden, Barack Obama and everyone else who is not Twitler.

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After Midnight

From POLITICO:

Senate Republicans released their partisan impeachment trial resolution on Monday evening, a blueprint that could result in President Donald Trump’s swift acquittal.

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) plans to pass impeachment trial rules giving both the White House counsel and House impeachment managers 24 hours over two days each to make opening arguments, according to a copy of the resolution. That will be followed by 16 total hours of questions and answers, culminating in a four-hour debate and a critical vote over whether to consider witnesses or new information.

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Rallying the Oops!

From Vox:

Democrat Andy Beshear has won the Kentucky governor’s race, ousting sitting Republican Gov. Matt Bevin, and giving Democrats a big win in a conservative state.

It’s a major loss for Republicans in a state where they hold supermajorities in both chambers of the state legislature, both US Senate seats, and five out of the state’s six House seats. Bevin pulled out all the stops to clinch a win; President Donald Trump rallied in Lexington, Kentucky, Monday night ahead of the election to turn out voters. But even that last-ditch effort wasn’t enough — a sign that Trump’s influence isn’t omnipotent.

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Here Comes the Bribe

From salon:

President Trump is rewarding senators that support him on impeachment with bundles of campaign cash, drawing accusations of political bribery.

…snip…

On Wednesday, Trump’s campaign issued a fundraising appeal to supporters to donate funds that would be equally distributed among Sens. Cory Gardner, R-Colo., Joni Ernst, R-Iowa, and Thom Tillis, R-N.C., all of whom are supporting the resolution [to condemn the House impeachment inquiry] and face tough re-election battles in 2020.

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