Tag Archives: Elisabeth Hasselbeck

The Witless Protection Program

I don’t know about you, kids, but I’m worried sick over Princess Sarah Palin’s future now that she’s told the people of Alaska to go f#¢k themselves stepped down from the governorship of Alaska. It’s been keeping me up nights, and since there’s not a damned thing on TV in the middle of the night other than informercials and commercials for wee-wee extenders, I’ve come up with a plan for her. First, she needs to have one last hurrah amongst her most fervent supporters. They include Bill Kristol (who likes to use parentheses), Elisabeth I’ll Tell You My View as Soon as I Get the Fax Hasselbeck, Rich I Touch Myself Lowry, Rush The Boss Limbaugh, and Greta I Am So Friggin’ in Love with Todd Van Susteren.  Of course, Captain Underpants John McCain will have to show up, because he can’t admit he was wrong in choosing her for his running mate. Once the adulation is over, though, it’s off to the Princess Protection Program!


Original book cover.
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Filed under 2008 election, Alaska, Books, Dick Cheney, Greta Van Susteren, humor, John McCain, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Happy Birthday, Barbie!

Hey kids, didja know that the Barbie doll just celebrated her 50th birthday? From ABC News:

Barbie may be turning 50 this year, but middle-aged, she is not. Of course, she’s kept busy during the years, with 108 careers & and counting. She’s been an Olympic athlete, a Marine Corps sergeant, a dentist, an aerobics instructor, an astronaut and a rock star. This week, Barbie will have her first show during New York Fashion Week and her 50th birthday will be officially celebrated March 9, 2009.

I thought we would add to the celebration with our very own array of Barbie dolls. We’ve seen some previously here at the Raisin. Remember Botox Barbie (scroll down to see all of her accessories and for Lying Racist Barbie!)? Why even Senator David Vitter couldn’t escape China Barbie’s charms! How about Caribou Barbie and all of her Barbie brood (scroll down past Cheerleader Elisabeth Hasselbeck Barbie)? Why, we even took a look in the window of the Caribou Barbie Boutique (hate for you kids to work so hard, but scroll down just one more time)!

And speaking of Caribou Barbie, you might be interested to hear that they have repackaged her to see if she will sell better! Take a look…

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Filed under 2008 election, David Vitter, Greta Van Susteren, humor, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Don’t Ask, Don’t Mattel

From ABC News:

ABC News’ Rick Klein Reports: The McCain-Palin campaign’s efforts to reach women is about to get a celebrity boost: Elisabeth Hasselbeck is set to join Gov. Sarah Palin on the campaign trail.

“The View” co-host said Thursday the McCain campaign contacted her a day earlier, to convey an invitation from Palin to introduce her at rallies Sunday in Florida.

I always thought that Elisabeth was Cindy Lou’s bestest buddy, but I guess she’s been handed down to Caribou Barbie. I guess Reality Show Barbie is now the official celebrity Cheerleader Sneerleader Barbie!

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Filed under 2008 election, Barack Obama, Guns, Hillary Clinton, humor, John McCain, NRA, parody, politics, Republicans, Sarah Palin, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs