Tag Archives: Straw Poll

Bye Bye Botox Batshit Bachmann!

At the beginning of the week, I read about the little spat that Botox Batshit Bachmann was having with her ex-campaign manager Ed Rollins. Ol’ Ed was a bit critical about her batshittery about the HPV vaccine causing mental retardation, and he remarked that she didn’t really have a snowball’s chance in Hell after the Iowa caucuses. Well, of course, Botox Batshit Bachmann was quite surprised. She would have looked like it, too, but with all the Botox, she is no longer able to raise her eyebrows. When asked about Ol’ Ed’s disloyalty to her and how he had previously dissed other candidates he had worked for, she said, “I guess I should have done that Google search.” She would have furrowed her forehead at that point, but, once again, the Botox. In response, Ol’ Ed said, “Well, if I would have Googled her, I would have found out she had 6 chiefs of staff in 5 years.”

Well, while they were busy regretting not googling each other, there are some new developments in the Botox Batshit Bachmann campaign ranks.

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Filed under humor, Iowa, New Hampshire, parody, politics, Republicans, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

Gov. Little Ricky Goodhair Gets (Ice) Creamed by Pizzaman!

From philly.com:

ORLANDO – Georgia businessman Herman Cain scored an upset win in the Florida Republican Party’s straw poll Saturday, dealing a setback to national front-runner Rick Perry.

…snip…

Cain received 37 percent of the 2,657 votes cast, more than twice as many as Perry, who made the most concerted effort here and captured 15 percent. He scraped by former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, who did not compete but finished with 14 percent.

“Folks, this is what you call momentum,” Cain, the former chief executive officer of Godfather’s Pizza and a tea party favorite, said in a video message to supporters. “The Herman Cain train is picking up steam.”

I admit, when I think of Herman Cain, I often think of certain things that steam…

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Filed under Florida, humor, Immigration, Iowa, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, parody, politics, Republicans, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, snark, television, Wordpress Political Blogs

When Parry Met Silly

From The Telegraph:

[Rick] Perry, who got into the 2012 race on Saturday, partly overshadowing Representative [Michele] Bachmann’s win at the Iowa Straw Poll in Ames, accepted an invitation to the Black Hawk County Republican Party dinner in Waterloo, Iowa last week.

Once she heard the Texas governor would be attending, aides to Mrs Bachmann, who was born in Waterloo, contacted the organisers to say that she would like to speak too. This set up a joint appearance that one Iowa politician predicted would be like the “shoot-out at the OK Corral”.

There was no confrontation but Mrs Bachmann’s move backfired. “She didn’t sit down to visit with us and eat with us,” said Mel Shaw, 57, one of the attendees.

“She came into the room like she was Madonna or something, a big star appearing before all us little people. She didn’t want to answer questions. That’s not the way we do politics here.”

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Schtick-on-a-Stick

From POLITICO:

Iowa Rep. Steve King called Michele Bachmann’s straw poll victory a testament to her “force of personality,” and predicted that newly-declared presidential candidate Rick Perry would have to work harder as a result of the outcome in Ames.

Asked if Bachmann’s win would make it harder for Perry to court tea party voters and other core Iowa activists, King told POLITICO: “It does to some degree. I don’t know how much. It’s hard to measure Rick Perry since he hasn’t been here.”

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