The Zombie GOPocalypse

Lisa Murkowski on the floor of the Senate:

I rise to address the trial of Donald John Trump. The founders gave this body the sole power to try all impeachments, and exercising that power is a weighty responsibility. 

…snip…

The President’s behavior was shameful and wrong.  His personal interests do not take precedence over those of this great nation.  The president has the responsibility to uphold the integrity and honor of the office.  Not just for himself but for all future presidents.  Degrading the office, by actions or even name calling, weakens it for future presidents, and weakens our country.

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They’d better hope shoe polish isn’t poisonous after all that bootlicking

From Chris Cillizza:

(CNN)—Congressional Republicans gathered at the White House Wednesday afternoon to celebrate the passage of a major tax cut bill with President Trump. It was a love-fest.

Front row: Orrin Hatch Middle row: Lisa Murkowski, Twitler, Diane Black Standing: Tim Scott, Kevin Brady, Mike Pence, Eddie Munst…I mean, Paul Ryan, Kevin McCarthy

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How can we miss you if you won’t go away?

Hey, kids, didja read the news today? POLITICO is reporting that   Eddie Munster  Paul Ryan is  scared shitless he will lose reelection in 2018  thinking about putting down his Speaker’s gavel and walking away from D.C. at the end of his term. If the tax cut bill that will enrich the uber-wealthy and destroy the middle class goes through, and he succeeds in decimating Medicare and Medicaid, then he will consider his job done. He wants to go home and jerk off to Ayn Rand documentaries  spend more time with his presidential aspirations  family. But wait, there’s more!

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When you say self-serving, you’ve said it all!

From NBC News:

Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., threw his support behind the Republican tax plan Thursday, boosting the bill’s chances of passage.

McCain said that while the Senate bill is “far from perfect,” he believes it will “enhance American competitiveness, boost the economy and provide long overdue tax relief for middle class families.”

The Maverick added, “But my wife Cindy inherited a Budweiser fortune, so fuck all that shit about working together and gimme those tax cuts!!”

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Hide the Children!

From Politicus USA:

On Tuesday, when asked about the senatorial race in Alabama between Democrat Doug Jones and Republican Roy Moore, who’s been accused of sexual assault by numerous women, President Trump responded, “We don’t need a liberal democrat in that seat.” He added, “Roy Moore denies it— that’s all I can say.”

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Who changes the diapers?

From npr:

Another Sunday, another Trump Twitter war.

This time, President Trump, who is spending the day at his golf course in Virginia, took aim at retiring Republican Sen. Bob Corker of Tennessee.

And Corker fired back.

“It’s a shame the White House has become an adult day care center,” Corker wrote. “Someone obviously missed their shift this morning.”

Adult? In years only…

Background, left to right: Ivanka, Jared Kushner, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Kellyanne Conway, Omarosa Manigault, Twitler, Stephen Miller, Mike Pence.

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Gun debate, you say? Oh, you’re a pistol!

From Newsday:

Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer on Tuesday called on President Donald Trump to convene both parties to discuss “some rational laws on gun safety” after a gunman in Las Vegas carried out the country’s worst mass shooting.

…snip…

But Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) and House Speaker Paul Ryan (R-Wis.) both said now is not the time to address gun legislation and made it clear their top legislative priority is the Republican tax plan and budget legislation.

Well then, when the fuck is the right time? Seriously, tell us. We’ll make ourselves available.

He can throw his white hood in the air!

To the tune of Love is All Around, Lyrics by Sonny Curtis (Theme from The Mary Tyler Moore Show:

♬Who can turn the right on with his bile?
Who can take a sunny day, and turn it into a big stinking pile?
Well, it’s you, Roy, and you should know it,
With each slur and with that tiny pistol, you show it. ♪

♫ They’ll slap you on the back and get all tribal,
So spread your hate around, and thump your bible.
It’s Alabama after all,
It’s Alabama after all. ♪

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