James DildO’Keefe

From Tracy Clark-Flory at Salon:

It isn’t entirely clear what James O’Keefe hoped would happen when he invited CNN reporter Abbie Boudreau onto his floating “sex den.” But the conservative prankster, who gained notoriety through his undercover ACORN sting, has certainly provided plenty of laughs this afternoon based on his proposed props for the stunt: dildos, lube, fuzzy handcuffs, Viagra and a mirrored ceiling. What, no edible undies or penis straws? O’Keefe says his plan was to “seduce her, on camera, to use her for a video,” as payback for “trying to seduce me to use me, in order to spin a lie about me.” A planning document obtained by the network reads, “The joke is that the tables have turned on CNN. Using hot blondes to seduce interviewees to get screwed on television, you are faux seducing her in order to screw her on television.” If you can follow that logic, congrats: You must be a young conservative.

austinpowersthespywhoshaggedme
Original DVD cover

At first, I assumed O’Keefe’s bizarre collection of sex-store sundries was a genuine, albeit tone-deaf, attempt to actually seduce Boudreau. However, I am going to generously credit O’Keefe with being smarter than that. So what was the purpose of these props? Maybe he wanted to trick Boudreau into believing she had happened upon a salacious story about another conservative with a sordid secret life just begging to be exposed. Given that O’Keefe sees CNN as wildly biased — which is funny, given that the network is “allergic to opinion to the point of occasional incoherence,” as Alex Pareene put it — it could be that he assumed Boudreau would run wild with the story and then O’Keefe would humiliate her by revealing it as a hoax.

…snip…

Maybe O’Keefe’s plan was simply to create an atmosphere of sexual humiliation — to coax Boudreau into an environment filled with sex toys and images of naked ladies — and then document her inevitable discomfort and embarrassment. All the while, O’Keefe makes over-the-top passes at her while she struggles to function in a professional capacity. (Boudreau reports there is also a lot of sexually explicit language in the planning memo that CNN has not yet released.) Whatever the exact plan, the imagined goal was humiliation. Sexual humiliation.  To make that “bubble-headed-bleach-blonde” squirm. The document frames all of this as payback, “a taste of her own medicine.” […] Who knows what O’Keefe was trying to achieve, but this particular stunt does uncover something that, unfortunately, seems all too common among his ilk: not just a dislike for the “liberal media,” but a special hatred for women.

Lusby, Maryland (CNN) — A conservative activist known for making undercover videos plotted to embarrass a CNN correspondent by recording a meeting on hidden cameras aboard a floating “palace of pleasure” and making sexually suggestive comments, e-mails and a planning document show.

James O’Keefe, best known for hitting the community organizing group ACORN with an undercover video sting, hoped to get CNN Investigative Correspondent Abbie Boudreau onto a boat filled with sexually explicit props and then record the session, those documents show.

The plan apparently was thwarted after Boudreau was warned minutes before it was supposed to happen.

“I never intended to become part of the story,” Boudreau said. “But things suddenly took a very strange turn.”

O’Keefe is best known for making a series of undercover videos inside ACORN offices around the country in 2009.

…snip…

O’Keefe’s next big splash ended with his arrest after he taped associates entering Louisiana Sen. Mary Landrieu’s office in New Orleans posing as telephone repairmen. He ended up pleading guilty to a misdemeanor charge of entering a federal office under false pretenses and is now on probation.

But he continues to do undercover projects through his organization, which is called Project Veritas.

The incident occurred in August, when Boudreau agreed to meet O’Keefe to discuss CNN’s request to be present on set for a music video shoot in which O’Keefe stars.

…snip…

For months, CNN had been following a group of young conservative activists, including Christian Hartsock, the director of the music video. The activists will be featured in a documentary, “Right on the Edge,” that will air October 2 and 3.

Hartsock said O’Keefe did not want CNN to shoot on the set of the music video, but said he would encourage O’Keefe to call CNN to discuss the request.

O’Keefe called Boudreau on August 10. During the conversation, he said he preferred that Boudreau meet him in person in Maryland and asked that she come alone.

…snip…

The phone call was recorded without Boudreau’s knowledge, but CNN obtained a copy of the recording after O’Keefe e-mailed it to friends and colleagues. Boudreau agreed to the meeting, which she understood would be in his office.

“The purpose of the meeting was to explain [the CNN story] in person to James,” Boudreau said.

CNN was forwarded an e-mail, sent from O’Keefe’s e-mail address, to the executive director of Project Veritas, Izzy Santa; and two conservative activists, Ben Wetmore of New Orleans and Jonathon Burns of St. Louis, Missouri, dated after the call with Boudreau.

“Getting Closer,” the e-mail states. “Audio attached conversation with Abbie. What do you think of her reaction guys. She said she could do it Monday, Tuesday. Ben, you think I could get her on the boat?”

Boudreau flew to Baltimore, Maryland, on August 17, rented a car, and drove to suburban Lusby, where O’Keefe wanted to meet. O’Keefe sent a text message to Boudreau that morning, saying that Santa would meet her when she got there.

…snip…

Santa told Boudreau that O’Keefe planned to “punk” her by getting on a boat where hidden cameras were set up. Boudreau said she would not get on the boat and asked Santa why O’Keefe wanted her there.

“Izzy told me that James was going to be dressed up and have strawberries and champagne on the boat, and he was going to hit on me the whole time,” Boudreau said.

A short time later, O’Keefe emerged from a boat docked behind the house. In that brief conversation, Boudreau told O’Keefe that he did not have permission to record her, and reminded him that the meeting was solely to discuss the upcoming music video shoot, and he had never mentioned that he wanted to tape their meeting.

Boudreau ended the meeting and left. After the incident, Santa gave CNN a series of e-mails she says shows O’Keefe intended to try to embarrass both the network and Boudreau through an elaborate plan.

…snip…

O’Keefe had also instructed Santa to print a “pleasure palace graphic” on a large poster, according to an e-mail.

CNN later obtained a copy of a 13-page document titled “CNN Caper,” which appears to describe O’Keefe’s detailed plans for that day.

…snip…

“The plans appeared so outlandish and so juvenile in tone, I questioned whether it was part of a second attempted punk,” Boudreau said.

But in a phone conversation, Santa confirmed the document was authentic. Listed under “equipment needed,” is “hidden cams on the boat,” and a “tripod and overt recorder near the bed, an obvious sex tape machine.”

Among the props listed were a “condom jar, dildos, posters and paintings of naked women, fuzzy handcuffs” and a blindfold.

According to the document, O’Keefe was to record a video of the following script before Boudreau arrived: “My name is James. I work in video activism and journalism. I’ve been approached by CNN for an interview where I know what their angle is: they want to portray me and my friends as crazies, as non-journalists, as unprofessional and likely as homophobes, racists or bigots of some sort….

“Instead, I’ve decided to have a little fun. Instead of giving her a serious interview, I’m going to punk CNN. Abbie has been trying to seduce me to use me, in order to spin a lie about me. So, I’m going to seduce her, on camera, to use her for a video. This bubble-headed-bleach-blonde who comes on at five will get a taste of her own medicine, she’ll get seduced on camera and you’ll get to see the awkwardness and the aftermath.

“Please sit back and enjoy the show.”

…snip…

The document states it was written by “Ben.” According to the e-mail chain obtained by CNN, Ben Wetmore sent the document to O’Keefe and Santa. In a statement e-mailed to CNN, O’Keefe wrote: “That is not my work product. When it was sent to me, I immediately found certain elements highly objectionable and inappropriate, and did not consider them for one minute following it.”

Video at CNN link, and here are excerpts from the document CNN received. Read all 6 pages. It’s hilarious!

38 Comments

Filed under CNN, humor, Mary Landrieu, Media, movies, parody, politics, Republicans, Scandals, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

38 responses to “James DildO’Keefe

  1. Blueball for Blue Ray! bwahahahahaha! Great choice for the story!

    O’Keefe would make a good villain for Austen Powers. The little fucker is evil, yet ridiculous.

    • did you read the 6-page document? it is so damned funny, especially when you keep in mind what an ugly little douchebag little jamesy is. one of the instructions he was given was to unbutton his shirt so his chest shows. can you imagine that scrawny chest with ribs sticking out being attractive to any woman? 😆

      • I didn’t read the document. O’Keefe and sex: bad paired-stimulus.

        I dig your groovy nonnie letters at the bottom, too. 🙂

        • you have to read the document. it’s 6 pages, but very short. it will only take you a couple of minutes to actually read it, but it will take you at least a half hour to stop laughing. it will be so worth your time.

          the font at the bottom is called keep on truckin’. i love that font.

          • Omg, accusing CNN of operating under a big lie while O’Keefers attempt to organize a big lie.

            *Racism against whites and minorities. So they hate everybody including themselves. (Doesn’t that sound Republican?)

            *O’Keefers already pulled off the fabricating evidence to pass off as news story…Acorn/pimp bullshit.

            *He scripts what she’ll say…like she’d talk like that!

            *What a slimeball and moron!

            • i can’t believe that people that stupid and out of touch have actual power. i would love to know who’s funding them.

              • If you’re going to be arrogant, at least have a triple digit IQ.

                Is he a product of old money inbreeding like Ben Quayle and Dubya?

                Will his drama diva persona come busting out of the closet in say a decade?

                I’ll be surprised if he doesn’t eventually end up doing a little time in prison. Maybe he’s bipolar. Fuck.

                • there are people behind the scenes telling jimmy dildo’keefe what an amazing activist he is. he’s just a tool for other people who are being funded by big money. breitbart seems to have thrown him under the bus, so i guess his jimmy do’k has worn out his usefulness at big government. however, there are always other outlets that will use him, and he’s so blinded by his own image of himself that he’ll buy it when they tell him how indispensable he is. he’s way too stupid to understand that he’ll be the one who will pay the price, whether it be prison time or people suing him, not the ones pulling his strings.

  2. kaylaspop

    That this super-dork-boy thought he could seduce this young woman makes you wonder about his sanity, as if we needed more reasons.

    • i wonder if he ever looked in a mirror. he said that the scenario was given to him, he didn’t think it up. i think whoever it was who thought it up needs to go see rand paul to get his eyes checked.

  3. jeb

    Gee, conservatives must be so proud. To have this hero, this example of maturity and American manhood around. What a f***ing tool.

    • when i was googling, i saw that newsbusters, the rightwing blog, had a story about this. i only read what was on the google page, because i won’t read their crap. however, it was clear what they were wringing their hankies over. rick sanchez had the nerve to wonder on air if faux news had anything to do with dildogate. doesn’t matter what this asswipe and his cohorts did. it only matters that faux news might have been wronged. 🙄

  4. can the right get any more loonier?

  5. Wow. So he really does think he’s a pimp.

  6. Pingback: Tweets that mention James DildO’Keefe « HYSTERICAL RAISINS -- Topsy.com

  7. Where, oh, where would they get the idea that O’Keefe, et. al. are “crazies, as non-journalists, as unprofessional.”

    It just boggles the mind …

  8. Joanaroo

    For being the parties of family values, the GOPers/Tea Baggers/Independent Conservative loons sure do obsess on the sex! Well, except for O’Donnell, supposedly. In the day and age when Americans were actually decent and educated, this little pimp-squeak would have been publicly ridiculed and thrown into the manure pile like the odious piece of shit that he is. There wouldn’t be fawning all over the little inadequate prick to defend himself. (Viagara at his age? Dumbass! You don’t display it on your coffee table, you take the damn pills! He’d probably would think priapism was caused by his animal magnetism—of a cockroach!). .I’d like to see he and Breitbart sued up the ass!

    • little andy is trying to distance himself from dildo’keefe, even though dildo’k posted at big government as recently as last week. he’s been tweeting that do’k is not his employee and is threatening to sue anyone who says he is.

    • My wife asked me about this “family values” and conservative thing.

      What I think is that there are some real family values types out there. But they’re not the ones in power. Rather, the people in power are perverts and sexists, frankly. They call it being “politically incorrect” and pretend that they’re being persecuted when someone suggests that calling women “babes” routinely isn’t appropriate.

      Knee-jerk reactionaries buy it, because they’ve been convinced that the world is out to get them and that there is no greater threat than PC. (Side note: I see the de-valuing of women as a bigger threat than political correctness. I’m just saying …)

      And so people who claim to be supporting family values are really wild crazy perverts. Look at how many conservative activists and pols wind up caught with prostitutes (of the same or different gender) or porn habits, or whatever else. Vitter, Craig, Paladino, Limbaugh, Foley, DeLay, Ryan, O’Keefe, etc.. The bondage club outing the RNC paid for, and probably lots of stuff I can’t remember (or have repressed the memory of).

      “Family values” makes a good talking point, but it’s like “character matters” in 1994 … they don’t really mean it. They just count on voters not noticing.

      • the family values people are split into 2 groups:

        1. those who did their dirty deeds and are now too old to get their dinkies stinky. (see: henry hyde)

        2. those who think they’re better than everyone else and live by different rules. they think they’re entitled to dictate to everyone else how to live, but they don’t have to adhere to those rules.

        my take is that “family values” should be up to families. as long as nobody is doing anyone else any harm, then people should decide for themselves what is right and what is wrong. morality should not be dictated by some imbeciles in d.c. or in state capitals. most people are decent, but they’re also human, and they make mistakes. if they’re only personal mistakes that affect only themselves and their families, they should be dealt with privately. that goes for politicians, too. howevah (because there is always a howevah), if politicians insist on sticking their noses in everyone else’s moral closets, then their closets should be flung open to public scrutiny.

        • Abso-frickin’-lutely.

          If you want to parade that you’re great because of your family values, then you make it fair game to discuss your pregnant teenage daughter or your live-in boyfriend … to take a couple pure-hypothetical examples.

          (Ahem!)

          If more values activists would spend time taking care of our families and less time trying to tell everyone else how good they are, they’d probably do more good.

          People might aspire to have the kind of marriage that the Carters have, or make a turnaround like Ted Kennedy in his later years, etc.. But who aspires to be a serial philanderer like Gingrich? How many people really want to be thrice-divorced (probably four times soon enough) like Limbaugh?

  9. “Fuzzy dice, bongos in the back…my ship of love is ready to attack” (Frank Zappa)…This jackass might score giving a 15 year old a ruffie but in the real world he couldn’t hustle a blow job down at the bus station. The extensive inventory forgot to list a tube of DeLay cream. And why would any newsorg think these guys a crazy and whacky little jerks? The only thing that could make this funnier is JO getting to “score” and getting hit 90 days later with a paternity suit. You just have to expect this sort of thing when you have worked for a guy whose name sounds like Bite-Fart. Izzy Santa?! What is this, Dick Tracy comix!?!….”Won’t you please…hear my plea….”

  10. Music videos? Maybe the could do the David Sevile thing and do all of Lee Greenwoods hits in the style of Alvin and the Chipmunks.

  11. Hey James O’Keefe graduated from Rutgers in 2006, how come we aren’t reading about how he joined the Corps and served nobly in Iraq during the Surge with follow on deployments to Afghanistan? Ohhh, that’s right as a Conservative he is a natural coward and chicken hawk…

    • hello grunge e gene,

      welcome to the raisin! 😀

      😆 you got me! my eyes must have been the size of saucers (and not those little wussy espresso-sized saucers) when i started reading your comment. i could not believe anyone would defend that asswipe. then your last sentence restored my faith in people. thanks for the laugh, and please stop by whenever you can.

      • Ha! Your work is awesome, but as a suggestion when referring to O’Keefe it might be helpful to always remind people O’Keefe is a Convicted Criminal for the Watergate Jr Affair.

        It won’t help dissuade conservatives from championing the little punk ass since conservative heroes are always criminals, chicken hawks, cowards, and bigots…

  12. goatchowder

    What a trooper! When he grows up, he can be just like his falafel, Bill O’Lielly.

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