Another Rethuglican Duhhh-bate

From THE HILL:

Republican Presidential candidate Rep. Michele Bachmann (Minn.) came out swinging against rival GOP contenders Mitt Romney and Newt Gingrich on Sunday as she aimed to paint them similar to President Obama on healthcare, cap and trade and the bank bailouts, dubbing them “NewtRomney.”

…snip…

The Minnesota congresswoman slammed former Massachusetts Gov. Romney and former Speaker of the House Gingrich for being “on the same side” of the healthcare issue as Obama a charge she levelled at her opponents during Saturday’s GOP debate.

theappledumplinggangrethugdebateOriginal movie poster

Bachmann also claimed other policy similarities between her GOP rivals and the president.

“Also, ‘NewtRomney’ are on the same side as the president when it comes to cap and trade, the $700 billion bailout, illegal immigration, even the payroll tax this week,” she added.

Contenders for the Republican presidential nomination were split on an extension of the payroll tax cut during the ABC debate Saturday night.

Romney, Gingrich and Rep. Ron Paul (Texas) all expressed support for providing another yearlong break for taxpayers although the former governor of Massachusetts took the opportunity to launch into an attack on the Obama administration’s economic policies.

“The payroll tax cut will help people,” Romney said. “But it’s just a band-aid.”

Bachmann remains opposed to an extension, saying it “shouldn’t have been put in in the first place,” during the debate.

“When you take a look and people say this is a two man race I would agree, but the one man is ‘NewtRomney’ and the other man is Michele Bachmann, the only proven consistent conservative,” said Bachmann.

55 Comments

Filed under Barack Obama, humor, Immigration, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, parody, politics, Republicans, Ron Paul, snark, Wordpress Political Blogs

55 responses to “Another Rethuglican Duhhh-bate

  1. The other man is Michele Bachmann? Um … is there something Bachmann needs to tell us?

  2. I never liked Don Knotts, but I see no reason why Matheson (Animal House Matheson!!!) and Conway have to suffer such hysterically raisony fate. LOL.

    Let me be the first one here to declare President Obama the winner of all 18,287 GOP debates of the 2011/2 primary season. Yeah, I am stealing from, like, three sources at once with that, but, hey, I use the plagiarism for good!

    On that happy note, I am happy to report that we have copyrighted this lovely gem and the appropriate logo merchandise is now available at cafepress.com/epicgopfail. We are using the proceeds to defeat Michele Bachmann in our MN CD-6 by financially supporting her opponent. Hopefully, Betty McCallum shall be it.

    nonnie, i hope it’s ok to peddle this stuff on your blog; i trust you know me by now to know that we do as we say. Let me know if you want a T-shirt.

  3. elizabeth3hersh

    Where was ♥♥♥Huntsman♥♥♥? The debates aren’t the same with him.

    • Where was Her Man Cain? His best debate performance to date, and he missed it!

      In case your question was serious, Elizabeth, Huntsman didn’t “qualify” for the debate because he failed to get 5% or better support in any Iowegian (or National that Iowegean Rethugs would consider valid) poll. He was mathematically eliminated for misusing a brain (whereas Her Man Cain was mathematically eliminated for misusing an entirely different part of his anatomy, but mostly the brain).

      • elizabeth3hersh

        Oh yes, that completely slipped my mind (coupled with incredulity that Huntsman would not make the 5% pre-qualification…what is frickin’ wrong with people?!?). I had looked to Huntsman as ‘ballast’ in choppy intellectual seas. I haven’t been this disappointed since Adam Lambert lost to Kris Allen on American Idol several seasons ago (levity has replaced any semblance of gravitas…it’s the only way I can cope). Thanks MN!!

        • The Republican Party is run by the nuts right now, and that applies whether you mean the establishment types or the TPers.

          Huntsman can’t get traction because he worked for Pres. Obama and because he thinks that scientific questions should be decided after getting at least a little bit of input from scientists.

          Huntsman’s rejection by the vast majority of Republicans ensures that I will have no respect for the GOP for decades to come.

        • Sedate Me

          Considering the rapid swings in Republican candidates’ poll results, that 5% threshold is now an even a bigger joke than it was before, which was pretty big. What better way to ensure a guy stays below 5% than to bar him from debates?

          The polls are clearly bullshit and so is limiting attendance based on them.

    • he was afraid of being out-charismaed by frothy santorum.

  4. elizabeth3hersh

    *without

  5. Yep ~ someone is missing from this circus freak show.
    The incredibly slimy Cain has slithered away.

    So this is what it has come down to–
    “You’re just like OBAMA”
    “Nuh Uh!”
    “Are too”
    “Am NOT!”
    “NewtRomney”

    Compelling stuff

  6. Consider this a little holiday gift for you & the Raisinettes

  7. Maybe she’s from that part of Minnesota where the women are strong and the men are good looking. Or she might be wearing a strap on. The “I know I am but what are you” dialogue is such a bore. The only excitement found yesterday was the Ron Paul ad about all those secret Chicom army units stationed in Texas!

    • i don’t know about the men being good looking. have you seen marcus? is it just me, or does he look like an older version of chaz bono? as for the strap-on, i bet marcus insists on that.

  8. jeb

    Didn’t see it and only regret that I missed Batshit coming out of the closet and admitting she’s a top.

    On another front of Rethug stupidity and obstruction is the latest by DeMinted and the rest of the no crowd in the Senate. This article doesn’t surprise me completely, it just sickens me further: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/10/opinion/collins-the-ghost-of-boyfriends-past.html?_r=2&src=tp&smid=fb-share

    • they block people who could help government run more smoothly, and then they bitch that government doesn’t run very well. i hope a meteor lands on him demented. he’s a piece of garbage.

  9. I didn’t watch (again) … and not even sure I could. Hey … we’re getting close to SC … when will we hear more from King Maker DeMint? Oh boy … I’m on the edge of my seat.

  10. It’s times like these that I’m glad to have told the cable company to take a hike.

    Duh-bate is right.

    • You and me both!

      It’s amazing how much better I feel knowing that I couldn’t watch the debates even if I wanted to. (No, they don’t strean online, and if you try to tell me otherwise I’ll plug my fingers in my ears and sing.)

    • this one was on abc, so you didn’t need cable to watch it. so, you really dodged a bullet, lulumaude! 😉

  11. Snoring Dog Studio

    Huntsman is running a relatively stress free and probably very intelligent campaign – with an eye on 2016. He’ll be back after the Republicans thoroughly trash one segment of the party and then appear as the Republican moderate that most sensible people can support. He’ll end up after all of this with his reputation pretty much unscathed, whereas, Bachmann and the rest will be amusing, yet bizarre, footnotes in history.

    • elizabeth3hersh

      Nice analysis SDS!!

    • Sedate Me

      Yeah, I only wish it were true. The only way that has a CHANCE of happening is if they get across-the-board slaughtered in 2012 (and probably 2014), which isn’t going to happen. I think there’s a much better chance of the Republicans getting control of both houses and the Presidency.

      The levels of insanity are likely to get worse in the Republican party, not better. It’s basically the history of the party over the last 30+ years. Every decade they move further right than the last. How they can get away with it is twofold.

      1) Unlike the Democratic party, the radicals are welcome in the Republican party. The party knows their policies only represent -at best- about 30% of voters and 15% of the population. They NEED the crazy and the stupid on their side.

      2) In America’s fucked up 2 party system, no matter how crazy they get, the Republicans will still win at least 50% of the time by sheer virtue of being the only other option. That’s more than enough to get what they want, especially when the opposition Democrats are such spineless wussies that they can’t even win when they have control of the House, Senate and Presidency.

      But you’re right, Huntsman is in it purely to be the Romney character’s heir apparent, the lone voice of (relatively speaking) reason that hopes to win the nomination by being “more winable”. (aka less insane)

    • i think huntsman thought he actually had a good chance this year, but now he knows he has a snowball’s chance in hell. he’ll play the part of the reasonable rethuglican and wait for the pendulum to swing back from the teabagger craziness. it will be interesting to see what he does once a nominee is chosen. he despises mittsie, and i would hope newtie is too crazy for him. if he endorses either one of them after all he’s been saying, i’ll have no respect left for him whatsoever.

      • Sedate Me

        He has no choice but to back Romney. He’ll get blacklisted by the Mormons and go to Mormon Hell if he doesn’t at least pretend to back Romney, especially if he wins the nomination.

        But I think you’re wrong about the pendulum swing. The only way the Teabaggers will lose substantial influence is if a Teabagger favourite wins the nomination (and nominations for congressional seats) and that causes the party to go down in flames worse than in 2008 (and it may have to happen again in 2014). That combination is highly unlikely. Teabaggers will have to be seen as murdering the party before the party makes a serious move against them. But by then, they might be in complete control of the party.

        But that’s another topic for another day.

        • He backed Capt Underpants instead of Mittsie in 2008. He might make one of those milquetoasty statements of support of the Rethuglican nominee, but I can’t see him going out of his way to do anything to get Mittsie elected. That might be a moot point, since it looks like Newtie might actually get the nomination.

          I think the Teabaggers have already lost influence, especially with the rise of OWS. When do you ever hear of Teabagger rallies anymore? They were a flash in the pan. Yes, they have reps in the House, but they’ve done nothing but give Bronzo the Clown agita. They’re loose cannons, and the establishment Rethugs are kicking themselves in the ass for ever kowtowing to them. Look at the Teabagger leaders–Botox Batshit Bachmann isn’t even a blip in the polls now, and Princess Sarah can’t even get a new reality show. What will remain is the influence of the Koch brothers’ money, but that was the case before the Teabaggers made the brothers’ influence so public.

          I think most mainstream Rethuglicans who haven’t been waterboarded with Koolaid are pretty pissed off that the Rethugs in D.C. allowed the Teabaggers to hijack the party. Look at the candidates they’re stuck with now. Do you think they’re really happy with them when even Karl Rove is wringing his hanky?

          • Sedate Me

            As many a wise man has said, (myself included) “Never underestimate the stupidity of the American public.”

            Unless they win it all, the Tea Party element will suffer a slight setback as what’s left of the establishment re-asserts themselves. But that’s actually the Teabaggers ticket into a more radicalized party establishment. It’s in keeping with the history of the party for the last 30+ years. The radicals act up, gain influence and move the establishment further right.

            As for protests, the Tea Party movement was launched by a bunch of insiders, so taking it to the streets just isn’t how they roll. The masses of moronic Teabaggers may be slightly more inclined to do that, but without those insiders, they are just puppets without anyone pulling their strings. The mobs were more a means to an end. Extras in a play.

            Those insiders most certainly don’t want to establish a precedent (ie Occupy Wall Street). What they wanted was a kind of Munich Putsch https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Beer_Hall_Putsch#Background A short, sharp, anger & beer-fuelled
            revolution that ended up with them in control. They’re in a consolidation phase now, so the extras aren’t needed so much anymore. But they have to be “listened to” until Nov2012.

            • i think it’s going to be a tug of war in the rethuglican party between the establishment rethugs and the teabaggers. i think bronzo the clown and a lot of the others are kicking themselves for allowing the teabaggers to take so much control. hopefully, the rope will get wound around all their necks, and they’ll strangle each other.

  12. Sedate Me

    This is the first debate I actually attempted to watch…and probably the last.

    I liked Newt’s shot at Romney “You’d have been a career politician if you won in 94.” (and Romney’s slightly fumbled response) Newt’s such a nasty asshole, it’s hard for an asshole like me to cheer against him sometimes.

    But the whole name-dropping crap Bachmann’s “Newt-Romney” and all the “Obama-care”, “Obama-economy”, “Obama-bailout” “socialism” etc. just got so obvious, so forced, so predictable, so unbearable, I watched about 10 minutes of this bullshit and then went door to door asking the neighbours if they had a gun I could borrow to shoot myself in the head. Fortunately, I live in Canada and guns don’t flow like water as they do south of the 49th parallel.

    • They all say the same thing over and over again. I think most people are watching just to see who will make the biggest gaffe (Gov Little Ricky Goodhair is always a safe bet) so they’ll understand what the Saturday Night Live skit is poking fun at. Botox Batshit Bachmann can always be depended on to have a new catchphrase that will last a few days on talking head tv. What I though was hilarious in this debate was how proud Gov. Little Ricky Goodhair was after he was able to get his accusation out that Mittsie’s book said that the entire country should have a health care plan like the one he put into being in Massachusetts. What a shame that Mittsie ruined his triumphant moment with the bet that overshadowed everything else that was said.

  13. John Erickson

    I’m sorry, I couldn’t watch this, I had something far more important to watch.
    I think it was The Simpsons.

  14. vote them all off the island already and dump on some atoll that had an abomb test

  15. 😆 I love Ron Paul under the horse and that lovely robin’s egg blue Tiffany’s bag Newt is holding.