Gaetz’s future relies on a wingman and a prayer

From DAILY BEAST:

“Joel Greenberg—the Rep. Matt Gaetz wingman who pleaded guilty and is now helping authorities investigate the congressman’s involvement in an underage sex ring—has so much evidence that he needs more than 44 days to share it.

In a court document filed Tuesday, Greenberg, the disgraced local tax collector, asked a federal judge to push back his sentencing.”

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“The letter describes “ongoing cooperation which will not be completed prior to his current sentencing date.”

In May, Greenberg admitted to engaging in sex trafficking, identity theft, and other crimes on the condition that he would turn over evidence that implicated others who helped him. He was scheduled to be sentenced on Aug. 19.

Greenberg has become a witness in an ongoing probe into Gaetz’s alleged paid sexual relationship with a 17-year-old girl, according to two sources familiar with the investigation who have spoken on condition of anonymity.”

(Don’t forget how chummy Gaetz and Greenberg were with Racist Ronnie DeSantis. And don’t forget that Kevin “Shecky” McCarthy has not stripped Gaetz of any committee assignments. And don’t forget that the GOP stands for Gross Odious Perverts.)

Back to Cruel(la)

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – The Trump administration could allow families to use federal education funding elsewhere if the local public school does not open during the coronavirus pandemic, the U.S. education secretary said on Thursday as the Trump administration seeks to pressure states and cities to fully resume in-person classes.

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Floridiot!

Go ahead and google the definition of fluffer, kids. I’ll wait.

From Fox 13 News:

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. – Thursday, President Donald Trump laid out his three-phase plan to re-open America. It’s a gradual, deliberate approach, first depending on, in part, a downward trend in positive COVID-19 cases and robust testing.

Friday, Governor Ron DeSantis said Florida would follow the federal guidelines — mostly.

”We will obviously use that as a baseline,” he said. “Doesn’t mean that Florida is going go do everything they say and not say. That’s a pretty good baseline.”

Translation: “I will do everything Twitler says.”

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Direct from Scott’s Bowels

From POLITICO:

TALLAHASSEE — The staggering unemployment exploding on President Donald Trump’s watch would worry any incumbent running for reelection, but troubles in Florida are injecting an added dose of fear into a jittery GOP.

Already anxious about Trump’s chances in the nation’s biggest swing state, Republicans now are dealing with thousands of unemployed workers unable to navigate the Florida system to apply for help. And the blowback is directed straight at Trump’s top allies in the state, Gov. Ron DeSantis and Sen. Rick Scott.

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Stunt Man

From NBC News:

A Florida congressman couldn’t mask his concern for the coronavirus outbreak.

Rep. Matt Gaetz wore a gas mask to Wednesday’s House vote on the $8.3 billion bill for emergency funding to help tackle the issue.

Matt Gaetz poses in his custom-made gas mask and tinfoil hat.

Stunted Intellect

From THE HILL:

“The View” co-host Meghan McCain on Thursday ripped Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.) after a group of GOP lawmakers stormed a closed-door impeachment proceeding on Capitol Hill.

“By the way, Matt Gaetz, when did you want to become a TV star?” McCain said. “You want to do that? Get the hell out of Congress. Get a TV job.”

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Where shopping is no longer a pleasure

Some Floriduhhh news, from The Buzz at the Tampa Bay Times:

The Florida supermarket giant Publix has given more money to Adam Putnam’s gubernatorial bid than any other candidate since at least 1995 and likely for the entirety of the company’s history.

Publix, the heirs to the company’s founder and its current and former leaders have given Putnam $670,000 in the last three years — or enough money to buy 74,527 chicken tender subs.

I thought they might want to update their logo.

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It goes from bad to Twitterverse

From the DAILY BEAST:

Kellyanne Conway and Donald Trump Jr. pushed messages from an account operated from Russia’s ‘troll farm’—including allegations of voter fraud a week before Election Day.

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